How to be a loner; the power of solitude
Hello friends.
Human apart from being creatures of habit we are also relational, it is in the communities we live in, and in the society that we develop ourselves. So relationship with other fellow men is important, we have that vacuum and the predisposition characteristics to relate. We have learnt that through nature and nurture. Being alone and separate from people for any reasons, it is not our thing. We hate being alone even if it is for good reasons.
It is not bad to desire to be around people, it is good and healthy. But it may become a bad thing and unhealthy also, if we do not learn to live with this natural desire. A health life demand that we should be in charge in the management of our lives, we need boundaries in everything both internal and external boundaries. The boundaries we set should be for ourselves and not for other people, this will help other people how to deal with us but also it will help us how to deal with us.
We need boundaries because certain things do not come naturally, they need certain discipline for that habit to be developed. One of those things that are important but do not come easily is silence, be alone, isolation or separation. This goes against the natural desire of being around people, yet to be psychologically a healthy person and successful in the thing you do, we need to learn the art of being alone, to separate our selves from the crowd and so that we may have time to work alone, to think alone, to evaluate alone, to read, to plan, to have fun and to rest alone. We need personal boundaries to achieve this habit
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Every great person I have ever known, every successful personal and leader have ever heard of, they practised the art of being alone. If there's a generation that needs to practise more separation, it is this generation. Who doesn't know how much our minds are preoccupied without all sorts of information and unfocused, our spaces are clattered with gadgets and things, our relationship are crowded because of of social media and our lives distracted as result of all that.
Being lonely is not a separation it is not like being alone, loneliness is being miserable, the feeling of unworthiness, isolated by people, is emptiness on the inside. It is a feeling that you do not have a control over. So this is not what I mean, when I talk about being alone. The separation to be alone I talk about it should be intentional, purposeful, planned and controlled by you. It is not also the arrogance that you do not need anybody, but it should because you want to sought out yourself so that you can handle issues, business and people, more appropriately, wisely and effectively.
In today's world we are so much distracted and preoccupied with other things to extent we have lost connection with our deep self. We are even unaware of the things going on around us beyond the surface and other things have been so much on us to the extent we have been addict to them its like without them there's no life, they have become like second nature to us and we have even forgotten who we real are. We are numbed, we can't feel ourselves. Nevertheless we can redeem ourselves from these shackles by creating the boundaries and the discipline of getting of the grid just to spend time with yourself. It wont be easy at first but it will be worth the effort at last trust me, because life is more fulfilling if you live connected to self.
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That is not the only value of spending time in I solitude habitually. Here is another value, creativity, wisdom, understanding, innovation, discovering and solutions. Many innovations and discovering have not be achieved in crowds, but somewhere in I isolation. Crowds distract, yet our minds work better when focused. Free and empower your mind through solitude. Sometimes the view of things is better from isolation not at the top of the mountain. i encourage you to develop this habit, it is helpful, I have benefited personally from this, it came so easy to me because of my personality. I know to some of you may struggle to form this habit because of your personality too, but you can develop it too. To some because you have been so much you used of being distracted, you may get scared but you can do it too. All of us can do it.
As I conclude let me warn you of this, if you are not careful you may get distracted in Isolation. Go into isolation to be focused on something, I cannot tell what you should focus on, choose for yourself but focus on that. It is health to be a loner, whole individuals make a better society. Trust me if most of us developed this habit things would be different and much better.
Otherwise thank you for taking tine to read this post.
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