Good Managers...
This photo was taken around this time last year that I’d posted on Facebook. My expression may not convey it, but I was very content with life that day. I’d just started my new job and was on my way to work. It was my entry back into the workforce after a year long career break, and previous to that, approaching 5 years as a part time IT contractor juggling motherhood. It was my transition back to full-time employment. My daughters were 7 years old then, so I was ready to let go a little and refocus on my career.
This week, I had my first year performance review. It went well even though I didn’t feel I put my best foot forward. I know I could do better. I enjoy my career; I’m not one of those who want to earn my living as an artist, a writer, a blogger, or care to boast about how I can sit at home in my bathrobe all day. That stuff I do at my own leisure without any pressure. I’m not one to complain about my job either. If I’m not happy with my workplace, I’ll leave. My philosophy has always been that there’s always a better opportunity around the corner.
Anyway, my manager and I chatted about getting older. I bemoaned how since hitting my 40s, I’ve become so forgetful. That the mind simply is not as sharp as it used to be. In most meetings, I would have to grab the whiteboard marker and draw stuff, if only to give myself visual prompts so I don’t lose my chain of thought. When I was in my 20s and early 30s, I never got why these older folks were so big on drawing a diagram in meetings. Now I do! Lol
He said to me: “Wait till you get to my age. I just hit 50. You stop caring!”
It was then, I expressed to him that I was concerned he’d leave. That I thought he was burnt out. He admitted to being very tired.
This morning, I came into work and he pulled me aside. He said: “I’ve resigned.”
He’d actually resigned the week before, but couldn’t say anything right away.
I got a little teary. I really like my manager. Even now I’m still digesting this. He apologised, but I understand his reasons. I’ve been there myself: burnt out, worried about family, and needing a different outlook.
I remind myself that people will come and go from your life, that the next person could have just as much to offer in a different way.
Life will go on.
But it’s still hard to lose a good manager.
I love that attitude, I get the sence way too many people constantly complain about their job or the workplace these days.
Sad to hear you lost your good manager.
As I mentioned in my comment @angiemitchell, we control our actions and we are responsible for every decision leading up to our current reality. Thanks for dropping by. :)
Positive people usually give of positive influences and when they go you can be left with a void that's hard to fill.
They say all good things must end! But that depends on how you look at things. We can always be worst off, but do we bounce back?
I like your attitude, the next person could have something to offer in a different way..
Yes, it’s how I’ve always approached people I interact with, be it real life or online. We can learn from everyone and every experience. I tell myself disappointment isn’t a bad thing. It motivates us to seek and embrace change. It has guided me well.
Thank you for you sparing a moment to share some thoughts. ❤️
You can still be friends with manager right? Sorry he left, hope another good one comes in 😊
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I’ve only known him a year. I would certainly catch up with him, but it’s not the same. My previous manager is a good friend, we’d worked together on and off for over 7 years though. :)
Thanks for dropping by ryi. Always so nice to see you. ❤️
Some people only comes into our life for a short time and others for much long! It just is!
Angie, I was surprised by the visit! You must have finished giving your husband ‘the stare’. Referring to the cat pic. Hehehe. It really is just is, we can only control our own destiny.
Hey Linny,
On loosing your boss: Good bosses are indeed a rarity and when they leave, for whatever reason, they leave a hole that can hardly be filled by another person. Life goes on as you write and I'm sure your new boss will also have qualities that you soon will appreciate very much.
On Forgetfulness: It started with me also with approx. 40 that I became sometimes forgetful. I think that's quite normal. When I was 50 I noticed that I couldn't remember names so well, strangely enough I forgot only names of actors, singers and public persons. I don't know why. Now I am almost three decades older than you and sometimes the short-term memory plays a trick on me, which is soemtimes rather funny and has no real consequences yet.
I've read that sleep (as someone says in the comments too) is very important for our memory. Also the learning of new contents while moving, as running, jogging, cycling promotes our memory. The intense blood circulation during sports also ensures that our brain is supplied with more oxygen and is therefore more efficient. That's why I always have my headphones with me and listen to scientific podcasts on all kinds of topics. I can confirm that this works.
So, here in Europe it is after midnight, its bedtime for me! Reading you soon!
I know. My biggest problem is sleep. I will die earlier from the fact I’m regularly allergic to sleep. Lol.
I use my fitness time purely for music and daydreaming. I tried the docos, I get dissatisfied that my mind can’t wander. I also read, allowing the mind to wander, to relax and flush out the bad stuff is good for us. :)
Although I know how important sleep is, I have the same problem since about two years. People say you need less sleep when getting older, this is ok, but often I do feel not rested and I am tired during the day. There are nights I only sleep 3 or 4 hours.
I have found two interesting articles, I would like to share with you, which confirm both view-points, mind-wandering and learning/thinking while moving. Very interesting stuff.
https://io9.gizmodo.com/5933423/the-right-way-and-wrong-way-to-let-your-mind-wander
https://www.inc.com/jessica-stillman/the-science-of-why-you-do-your-best-thinking-while-walking.html
@linnyplant, When we go through from the old pictures then for sure it hold the memories which we can relive in an thoughtful way. And yes, every human being is passerby and they will come and go, our story of life should be continued.
Wishing you an great day and stay blessed. 🙂
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Hi chireerocks. Although, I’m sentimental about people, I’m also someone who needs change. It’s why I’ve often moved companies. So yes, my story will continue. I’m hopeful 2019 will be a good year for my career.
Thank you for the thoughtful comment.
Welcome and good wishes from my side. Have a great time ahead. 🙂
Its sad that those who take their job really seriously are the ones who burn out.
Those who don't care don't hit the wall, and don't walk away. Kind of wish they would.
I know what you mean. I remembered you worked night shifts, so hoping no one is aggravating you too much, on top of working tough hours for raising a family.
Thanks for visiting, Mat. A lovely surprise to see you drop in.
Hard and unsettling: you don't know who will take their place. Tip from another person their 40s: Make sure you get enough sleep, that works wonders on a faulty memory
So pleased to see you again, nik. :)
It is unsettling, 2019 is going to be interesting. Yes, more sleep. My husband is always telling me this. I just think better at night when I know everyone is asleep, but it’s a viscious cycle.
Came for the photo, but finished reading the whole deal. You gotta be kidding me. 40? You looked like 20!
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They say risk only comes from not knowing what you are doing.