Long live Defiance, Long live Resistance.

in Dream Steem12 days ago

Defiance:

behavior in which you refuse to obey someone or something. a daring or bold resistance to authority or any opposing force.

1.Defiance for an Education

I did my graduation from a college when a major issue came my way. I was willing to do majors in biology but I was from a small city. We didn't have any universities and colleges that were offering MSc.

I asked my parents to send me to another city to study. It wasn't a norm in my family to send girls to another city in pursuit of an education.

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My parents didn't send me.

I was a science student and obviously, I would major in science too.

My city hadn't had this opportunity. My family and friends suggested doing arts instead, now that you can't go to any university or another city.

I had only two options, to do a master's in English or study law.

After doing some research I came to know that getting admission in English wasn't possible after BSc. I sighed with relief.

Law, I didn't pursue it, because I knew I would never practice it so why waste my money?

I said NO to them, I would only continue my studies in science.

The time of my admission passed. I cried a lot and prayed immensely to study my favorite subject. No scenario could promise me that I could study further.

That whole year I spent crying and praying and reminding my parents that I would go to university one day.

My prayers were answered because the next year the university in my city introduced many programs offering M.S.C in science.

I couldn't believe that my dream was unveiling in front of me of completing my education.

If I hadn't refused or objected to them and showed resistance and went for arts instead, I would never have had to study science at last.

As @weisser-rabe said in her previous post:

"Where there's a will, there's a way."

2. Defiance in front of opposite gender

I was in college when a gross thing happened when I refused to obey the authority, which I could relate to as defiance.

It was the last day in our college and our group was in the college to get roll number Slips for our FSC exams. We went in colored clothes and I also took my mobile phone as well.

It was not allowed only when you were a student and wearing a uniform.

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We collected our slips and took some selfies on the college road. Our mistake was that a guard saw us doing it. They had seen my camera.

We immediately hid it, though they didn't know if we were outsiders or college students.

But the guard dared to walk towards us and asked me to show him what was inside my bag(I put my phone inside, that was all we could do to maintain the discipline).

My mind was blown and I retaliated immediately, you can imagine me almost saying How dare you ask to see what's inside my bag? (though I didn't say this exactly).

Don't you have girl guides who can scan our bag? Look around you will find many. If you are that curious to look inside my bag ask her to do it.

It was a girl's college and they had girl guides (out of students) who were there to maintain discipline among the students.

That guard went over board to tease a group of girls (us) however, his fellows weren't bothered about it at all.

That guard became silent and went away. He didn't call for an inquiry team to check us, fortunately.

3.Defiance at a wedding

It was the wedding of my cousins, they were getting married to each other. It was their reception and the guests were mostly family members from their side.

Many male guests were their relatives and not mine.

It was my first time covering my head at any wedding. I had started covering my head from unknown males lately.

Therefore, it would be hypocrisy to not cover it from them at a wedding.

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When I got in the hall my cousins approached me, all of them came with covered heads from their homes, but now I didn't see any head covering.

I didn't mind it was their own choice.

However, they started judging me like:

oh yar, remove your Dupatta(head scarf) please, look at the gathering, what are people gonna say

Have you come to any religious gathering? Said one of the middle-aged woman, who wears an Abaya/cloak when goes out usually

It's a segregated function, there is a partition Amina, who are you concealing yourself from?

I looked around, pointed my fingers toward a man and asked;

If it's a segregated function then what is he doing in the female side?

(I don't mind combined functions)

Many males started coming towards the female side. I didn't remove my head covering.

They perused me for half an hour. I looked around and found no young girl with a head covering.

Not for a split second I thought to obey them or feel like removing it.

My response was:

Hy ladies, please don't waste your energy, I am not gonna remove it, nor will judge you for not wearing it, enjoy your function.

I was firm on my stance and they didn't say any more thing.

I won every time I refused to obey anyone I didn't believe right.

Long live resistance.
Long live Defiance

I hope I'm not too late. Appologies if it's too long. I just wrote this impulsively

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I love how you stand up for yourself and refusing to bow to societal pressures. Whatever you feel isn't right, doesn't have to be right just because it is practiced by everyone, your personal conviction is the best. I am happy you finally studied science as you have wanted, I like science but cos of math I totally avoided it.

Not too late, not too long and all too appropriate! Thanks for the lovely insight into your defiant head ;-)) From my distant point of view, you did everything right... ;-))

You are too kind for understanding it👭

Thank you, friend!
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Amina I loved your contribution. Too good.

And about your stance on head covering. Totally nailed it. I also don't judge people for wearing it or not wearing it. Their choice.

The only time I have a problem with it is the double standards and hypocrisy. Some of my cousins and friends selectively wear headscarves, which is their choice and I respect that. However, it bothers me when the same people or their parents present them as examples of girls who cover up. That's when I get upset. And to top it off, they choose to remove it at their own wedding, the one day they're the center of attention. Everyone sees them, including the male photographer. I can't stand this hypocrisy.

"Do whatever you want, just stay out of my business and don't you dare preach me."

I join you:

Long live resistance.
Long live Defiance

Thank you Amina♥

I just pray that i never go down from the ladder where i am standing currently(wearing dupatta on my head). I just wish that people never mention my name among the hypocrites.

So i do what i can do everywhere.

Honestly speaking, life is already hard for everyone and i don't get it when people(mostly women) start judging and gossiping about things, which are not their concern.

at their own wedding,

This is Shadiyoun py to sab chalta hai Mentality🙇

For such people you have to be a little Badtameez🙆

Kya krain bhaaii zamana bhttt teez Hai, wrna log Allah miyan ki gaye samaj lain gy

"Do whatever you want, just stay out of my business and don't you dare preach me."

Perfect🍸💃

I just wish that people never mention my name among the hypocrites.

insha'Allah.

And even if you choose some day to not do this (although I am more than sure that you won't) I would never label you as hypocrite. It's your choice.

I just get pissed when people have double standards.

Jese bahu agr gaon jaey tou sr pr dupatta ho, lekin beti kee kher hey. Yes that happens!

Thank you yar♥

Jese bahu agr gaon jaey tou sr pr dupatta ho, lekin beti kee kher hey. Yes that happens!

It reminds me of an indian drama yeh rishta kya kehlata hai, if you have seen it😉

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