Your tattoos probably suck, but if not I'll masturbate to them, possibly.

When I was 17 my uncle chastised me for always buying tattoo magazines with girls, inked head to toe, on the covers. Every paycheck after a construction job I'd buy two or three from the local gas station where we lived in Mexico.

He told me I should buy a real porno. I saw in-person tits and ass so infrequently and I didn't a medical shot inside a cooch to get my girl orgasm. Funny how that works.

Still to this day there is nothing sexier to me than wet tattooed flesh.

And Funko Pop styled tattoos are fucking it up for me.

New School is thumbs down forever.

Don't even shit in my Cheerios and tell me it's the chocolate shocker.

It is the tribal barbwire of A E S T H E T I C.

But the scene greets it with ooo's and aaah's because the normcore Billies and Sallies wised up and stopped getting tribals that not even tribes get.

Or my personal all time favorite to hate on, the Gangsta "Taz" Tasmanian Devil tattoo smoking a blunt and flipping you off with one almost indecipherable shit finger.

XOXO,
Josie