9/12/18

Sorry it's been a while. Since the last day I forced a performance, I had a little relapse, sick-wise. Started coughing up thick green chunks again, couldn't be too active without my heart murmuring and whining, no energy. Felt loads better after I took a 14 hour powernap a couple days ago, so I seized on the momentum and decided to kick my ass again, see if this would be the internal baking session I'd need to cook whatever infection is in there the rest of the way out.

Also, I am pretty sure I've discovered which of the exercises it is that's fucking up the external ridge of muscles on my right fore-arm. So, until further notice, no more overhand-grip rear deltoid fuses.

Bike(Cardio): 15 minutes. Level 12. Average RPM: 64. My heart was already sputtering and whining by this point. I still did my 15 minutes. I pretty much walked into the gym crazed on my own fumes, but I saw the practical sense in not pushing something that specifically targets a vital organ that is already whining.

Bench Press (115 lbs): 31 reps, no breaks. I started to lose strength to my arms by rep 27, so I hinted at my former glory days and allowed myself some vocalization, per uplift.

Pec Fly(120 lbs): 30 reps, no breaks.

Abdominal Fuse (120 lbs): 30 reps, no breaks.

Leg Extension(120 lbs): 30 reps, no breaks. I went fucking berzerk on this one. I powered through like it was 10 or 20 lbs less. I felt the fatigue/burn in the legs as I went...but...hm. It's difficult to describe my mindset in that moment. I've sampled the "Gymbro" mindset, and no explanation I've heard from them would quite suffice.

Seated Leg Curl(120 lbs): 30 reps, no breaks. Slamming the weight up, letting it glide back down...

Leg Press (120 lbs): 30 reps, no breaks. Steady...

Chest Press(120 lbs): 3 reps. I could tell from the word Go that this was the one exercise that my week of inactivity had hurt me the most with. So instead of going down in weight...I would extend the bars completely, and, maintaining full control, slowly allow the weight to push my arms back to base. My goal was to make each rep last for a minute. I succeeded...

Shoulder Press(120 lbs): 30 reps, no breaks. I flew right through this one. I couldn't help myself; at one point I found myself chuckling at how this one had become easier with inactivity. And the sheer demonstration of power compared to what I started with.

Lateral Pull-Down (120 lbs): 30 reps, no breaks. I was catching people staring at me using my good eye and the wall mirror. Probably had something to do with how red my face was, and how every other rep, my arms would start to fail me. My arms would be dragged back to almost base, completely extended back up...and then I'd pull my mental triggers again, and the process would violently reverse.

Lower Back Fuse(120 lbs): 30 reps, no breaks.

Seated Row(120 lbs): 30 reps, no breaks. Quicker, and definitely easier, than normal. I'm pleased, overall.

Bicep Curl(35 lbs): 5 reps, no breaks. My heart started up again...so I settled for the 'Checkpoint' of 5. I expect 10 of myself by the next time, relapse or not.

Tricep Extension(40 lbs): 15 reps with the left arm emphasized, 15 with the right, no breaks. Proof of what I was saying on other social media, my triceps are ridiculously developed/stronger than the rest of my arms.

Weighted sit-ups: Two 35 lb plates on my upper chest, 30 reps, no breaks. I felt like I was going to puke the entire time...but I did it. I gave no ground.

Weighted back raises (Draping myself from the waist down across a bench, raising from the waist up until back is straight with two 35 lb plates clasped on my chest) 30 reps, no breaks.

Incline Elliptical(Cardio): 15 minutes, level 12 difficulty. Managed a constant of 115 RPM average.

Power Press: 70 lbs. 14 reps, no breaks.

Rear Deltoid Fuse: 70 lbs, 30 reps, no breaks. Another set of 30 with the other grip method.

Reverse-grip Bicep Curls: 50 lbs, 30 reps, no breaks.

3-finger Fingertip pushups: 0.5 reps. My wrist gave out on me both times I actually started to lower my weight.

Weighted Dips: 3 reps. I was just testing the setup. I'd seen people use it before, but hadn't really studied how it works...I amended that today.

Weighted Chin-Ups: 2.5 reps. Same as the above. Except...when I tried getting off the machine, the pedestal started raising at a rate that almost up-ended me.

Tonight's musics come from the Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance Soundtrack. More specifically, the track that plays during the boss fight against Monsoon. I came across the scene before his boss fight, found lyrics to the track to what I thought was just a good, fast-paced song, and found that I had a much easier time empathizing with at least this fictional character.
And knowing the lyrics made the overall feel of the track that much more potent for me in light of what empathy I can register with them. Where this became as electrifying for me as it was, was with the energy put into the actual track, and my memory of the simpler parts of the scene. The rain, the harsh sound of blade on blade, the tempo.