How to Stay Positive When It All Seems To Be Going Wrong

in #blog6 years ago

Original post on the blog at: https://www.themoneylifejuggle.com

Everyone faces hardship at some point in their life. I do not care who you are, at some stage in your life you will face some form of hardship. Be it; loss of a loved one, financial struggles, emotional struggles, losing a job, losing a wife or husband....whatever it may be, we all have to go through life and handle some difficult situations.

I do not measure a man or woman by how hard they fall, i measure a man or woman by how high they bounce when they hit the bottom. We all make mistakes and we all make some bad decisions, it is what makes us human, however, i refuse to believe that past failures define who we are. You are not the same person you were 10 years ago, you aren't even the same person you were a few months ago. Life is about moving forward and trying your best to make consistent improvements to your life.
So what failures and hardships have i faced?

I'm no different to anyone else. I am a regular guy who does regular things. I have faced the deaths of loved ones, failures and losses of jobs.

I got thrown out of college for simply going on a holiday with my friends....after all my exams (Yes really). I faced redundancy in the very first job i had before id even completed my apprenticeship, i worked horrible manual labor jobs for minimum wage, quite literally shoveling shit for peanuts. I have spent time collecting welfare with absolutely no idea of what to do.
I started a new career and faced redundancy a year later because the company i worked for went into liquidation. I have went from 110k a year to ZERO. I have been rejected from multiple jobs and failed many times in life, however, i am not unique.

In this day and age, having a regular job is no longer the 'safe' option. You could go to college and rack up a mountain of debt and potentially get a good job. Some people will succeed and some people wont, that is just how the world works. Many of us will face unemployment or redundancy at some point in our lives. The world doesn't work the same as before. Many years ago, during my Grandparents time, one could walk out a job on Friday and walk into a new one on Monday, as well as scoop up a property for around £8000. That world no longer exists.

I am here to tell you that there is hope. So how do you maintain focus and happiness while everything seems to be going wrong?

Firstly, you appreciate what you do have.

Although everything seemed to be going wrong for me, at various points in my life, i always stopped to appreciate what i did have. Did i have money, prospects of a bright future or any plan? No. But i did have a great family who loved and supported me, i did have a great group of friends and perhaps most importantly, i had my health. Many people in the world were far worse off than i was. It is essential to condition your mind into appreciating what you do have and learning to appreciate the small things in life. Money can certainly buy comfort and it for sure releases many stresses, however, it isn't everything. When you don't have much else, you learn to appreciate what you do have. Take some time to invest in your health and your relationships with your closest family and friend. Those, for me anyway, are the three most important pillars of life. Everything else is secondary.

Once i took a step back and realized what was important to me, it soon became clear that even with the absolute bare essentials i could be happy. I didn't need flash sports cars or mansions so long as i had my Health, family and friends. There is always someone there to help you through the hard times and if there isn't; find them.

Realizing that although i was poor and didn't have much options, i was OK. I wasn't in grave danger, i wasn't going to die or be living on the streets. Often we over exaggerate our struggles which can play heavy on our shoulders.

Obviously some peoples situation is far more extreme than mine, however, there is always hope and so long as you are alive and breathing, things can always get better.

Things don't magically get better.

You need to get your own life under control and make something happen. Very rarely does something come to you. You have to keep it together and keep moving forward. Positive steps will see your goals and small, consistent improvements will compound over time to make your life better. Use bad situations or negative life experiences as learning mechanisms. Use them as opportunities to re-asses life, figure out what went wrong and figure out how to not make those mistakes again. There is always an opportunity to better yourself but you have to make that adjustment yourself, nobody is going to do it for you. It is up to you to grab life by the horns and take it where you want to go.

Negativity is a killer.

Question: What does being negative get you?
Answer: Nothing.

Negativity in any situation is almost always bad and people simply do not want to be around negative people because that negativity is draining.
Have you ever been around someone who constantly complains about everything? It is exhausting and i for one simply do not want to be around those people.
Bad things happen to us all at some point in our lives, nobody goes through this life without a bad situation. It is those who stay positive and rise to the occasion that win at life. You have to learn how to handle bad situations.

Let me tell you this: there is always a new job to chase, there is always a new man / woman you could connect with, there is always a new business you could start, there is always someone who will support you, there is always someone who can enrich your life in some way, there is always new things to learn, there is always new experiences to experience. There is always a reason to keep on living.

Spend time doing that which excites you.

People look for enjoyment out of life. The route to happiness is quite simple: Spend time doing things which excite you. You can choose to be inspired and you can choose to spend more time doing things which you enjoy. Expel the things in life which drag you down and spend more of your energy doing those things which lift you up.

It is important to remember that you aren't here for a long time. You get one shot at this game called life and you need to enjoy it, regardless of your situation.

Whatever you can do to maintain a positive outlook, do it.
Read personal development books, listen to success stories, learn from entrepreneurs, learn a new skill, get in shape, start new hobbies, change careers, change your circle of friends if need be, learn to appreciate the small things in life, build stronger relationships with people, choose to be inspired, create something.

Whatever it is that helps you better yourself, you need to take action. Thoughts without action mean nothing. You are in control of your life. Take it upon yourself to get it together!

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