Currently day dreaming of: getting my hands dirty in my very own magical place and safe haven last summer

In order for me to grow apart from my 11 year toxic relation ship with my evil step sister ( aka anorexia) I had to find some thing alittle more theriputic this time round. Unfortunately rehab, therapy, being admitted to the hospital every other month and totally destroying my mental & physical health was no longer helping me change my restrictive mindset. Thankfully, as I slowly started planting more and creating my very own succulent arrangements during all of my down time, I started to feel alot of good feelings that I haven’t felt in a long time. Feeling rewarded felt less foreign to me the more I got down and dirty planting. I was in charge this time, not my eating disorder. For the first time I got to see something as small as a seed, grow and bloom (must I add it’s such a beautiful sight and 2 years later it has yet to get old). Never would I ever deprive my plants from sun light, proper temperature, water when needed or giving it new home when it grew out of its little potter. So it had me thinking. Why have I deprived myself from the nutrition I’ve needed to survive and be healthy? Thanks to my magical buds over here I’ve decided to look at myself as a very fragile seedling, pushing foward through the mucky dirt and to one day bloom my self. I hope any one else doing everything they can to recover from a eating disorder can find just one! positive thing to keep their eye on the prize too.
Just for today, I love my self & this life and I choose to see the light, grow and bloom too! What about you?