Learn to be comfortable failing just don't be an ultimate failure.

in #busy6 years ago (edited)

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What was your thought when you saw my title?
Did u think to yourself,does she love to fail?
Is she saying failure is a good thing?.
According to the Wikipedia,Failure is the state or condition of not meeting a desirable or intended objective, and may be viewed as the opposite of success,it is the lack of success in achieving something.

While so many people will see failure to be the most negative of all,I feel failure is just the stairways to success,why?if you make research and findings you will see that most of the successful individuals that ever lived all failed big time. Some were widely considered to be massive failures in life but somehow they all managed to turn things around for themselves,they simply found their weak spots and pro founded effective solutions to it to achieve success.
Failure is inevitable, at a point in life one must fail so enough of being scared of failing ,instead prepare for chances of failure with backup plans to achieve success.

To me,failure is not when you try and it don't work out for you,or when you unsuccessful at something, failure to me is when you give up on something because you afraid of a negative result,thereby ruining your chances of finding diverse routes to the solution of a situation.

When confronted with life’s biggest opportunities, most of us shit the bed. And then we enact a number of strategies to avoid the pain and pressure inherent in reaching for our dreams.

when confronted with failure, we primarily see all the negative aspects that come with it. We entirely oversee the benefits of failing. Yes, benefits of failing. Each failure provides the opportunity to grow stronger. Failure offers the chance to return stronger, wiser and smarter than we were before. But we have to actively make use of this opportunity. If we don’t, then failure will destroy us

No one ever said you have to get things right the first time you tried it,success comes from a gradual proceaa of discouvering best ways by which things are done,its the result of the mental strength to keep fixing things done in the wrong ways until we eventually get it right.it doesn't matter how many times you failed,its the one time u get it right that matters the most.

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.
Winston S. Churchill.

Alot of people allow themselves to be discourage by failure,thus plunging themselves into a deep depression which ultimatesly lead to more failures,as a result the more they fail,the more they believe that they are "failures in life".and once this is initiated and they see nothing but failure all round them, the world around them will reflect this belief.

I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”
Thomas A. Edison.

These are reasons why most of us not fail but are a total failure

you’re afraid to stand out among the crowd
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Emerson wrote, “Society everywhere is in conspiracy against the self-reliance of every oneof its members.”

People don’t like it when other people become better or do something spectacular that tremors them,make them feel awkward or insecure. Pushing ourselves to reach our own greatness threatens the complacency of those around us, shining a light on their own squashed dreams and failed potential. In most cases they tend to lash out and try to dump their garbage on other people. It makes them question themselves,which is difficult for them to handle.

Most people who have believed themselves to be failures,walk around all day with a garbage load of anger and depression to the point it angers them when they come into contact with someone who is different, does things differently from the way they do things.
Life is simple if you wanna be incredible you have to do something that makes you stand out above the rest,dont follow the crowd,become comfortable being different,be spontaneous,be you with a dash of cocoa and awesomeness,If you have to be crazy,be crazy with style,yes people might think you weird, crazy,selfish, arrogant, irresponsible, obnoxious, stupid, insecure and all that,the ones closer to you may be your biggest challange become the harshest. If you have weak boundaries orare not confident with your own ideas and desires, then you’re not going to make it very far.

You’re not persistent enough
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Karl Marlantes
An authur finally published"Matterhorn"in 2009, a novel based on his experiences in the Vietnam War. The book was a hit. Referred to as “one of the most profound and devastating novels to ever come out of any war by the new York times. Mark Bowden,bestselling author of Black Hawk Down declared it the greatest book ever written about.The Vietnam War.It took over 35 years for Marlantes to get his book published,that is more than half of his
lifetime. He re-wrote the manuscript six separate times,for the first two decades,publishers hardly read it, much less rejected it.

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Colonel Sanders
founder of KFC, was 65 when he decided he would sell his fried chicken recipe,while living in his car, Sanders drove around knocking on doors, sleeping in his car, wearing his white suit,he was told no 1009 times,At age 90, in 1964, Sanders sold Kentucky Fried Chicken to a group of investors for $2 million which is $15.3 million today.
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Nelson Mandela
went to jail for 27 years,At age 25,he was an activist for equality and justice.all those times he was in jail, Mandela never gave up on his fight for freedom and equality. When he was eventually released he became President of South Africa and ended Apartheid – a system of racial segregation in South Africa enforced through legislation.
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J.K. Rowling
was jobless, divorced, lived off welfare
In 1993,at that time she had only been able to cmplete just three pages of Harry potter,Her situation was so bad she had to live on government-assisted welfare.Two years after her Harry Potter script were rejected by all 12 major publishers at that time.but that didnt stop her,she persisted and a year later, a publisher gave her an advance of £1500 and published just 1000 copies of her book.Rowling has sold more than 400 million copies of her Harry Potter book since then,and the movie,well whoever ain't seen harry potter must be living under a rock.

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** Elvis Presley**
Fired after his first performance
In 1954,at the Grand Ole Opry in Tennessee. The manager of the Grand Ole Opry Jimmy Denny told him “You ain’t goin’ nowhere, son. You ought to go back to drivin’ a truck.” but it didnt stop Elvis,he went on to become the best-selling artist of all time, second to The Beatles.
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Steven Spielberg
Was rejected from film school three times by the University of Southern California School of Theater, Film and Television but still didn’t give up on education or filmmaking.He was later accepted by another school but dropped out to become a movie director. Thirty-five years later he returned to school to finally complete his work and earn his BA.

Imagine if all these people had not being persistent despite the challenges and door slamming they faced,if they had simply given up just because they failed one time or were rejected a million times would they had achieved this?,no. Most of us give up on something we’re passionate about too soon. anyone who’s been successful has a tale of struggle and perseverance to share. As the cliche goes, nothing worth having comes easy.
you lack humility
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It pays greatly to be humble,There are many people out there who accomplish so great in life just by being humble even to those whom they know they are higher than in life,and also some people who has achieved very little bit and because they decide that they are experts.Humility is knowing what you don’t know,and you can only get to acquire such knowledge when you humble yourself because even a five year old kid could give you a business idea that's worth millions.People who go around bragging regularly about how much they accomplished, exaggerated their successes and sapped the attention they would have gotten from others around them,i mean who would want to sell to a self proclaimed millionaire another business idea or concrete advice that will fetch him more money.

These kind of people may not even be successful,people who are legitimate millionaires, those who actually did scale to the peaks of their industries, often admitted that they did not have the answer to everything, they downplay their success,and regularly pointed out their weaknesses and how they needed to learn more.

You fail to network and build strong relationships
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It’s said that 66% of people hired for a
job know someone within the company
that’s hiring them. But even in the non professional world, isolation can undo
you just as quickly. Instead of going
broke, you just go depressed.Creating
a wealth of social and romantic
relationships hinges on the ability to
meet people and connect with them in a
meaningful manner. Research shows
that living without regular social contact
is as unhealthy as smoking cigarettes.

I used to be a perennial loner,my own company was my best friend and i valued it greatly,i used to love working alone and would rather just give up on something than talk to someone about it,this of cause proved counterproductive.making me miss quite a few opportunities to learn new things because of my hesitance to reach out and connect with people who could have helped me achieve more out of life.Do not isolate yourself from the rest of the world,it will surely lead you to little or no place.
Constant communication and meetups with people of different caliber will bring to you different opportunities and solutions to diverse problems in life,build a stronger relationship with everyone you meet,everyone has alot to offer be it negative or positive,even a negative experience can lead u into achieving something great.

you’d rather argue against advice instead
of taking it.

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I once had this friend who would rather argue and quarrie you when you advice him against something,he felt he needed no ones advice and always went on to do things his own way.He runned a small cyber cafe and at most wanted to take care of everything on his own,he literally tried to fix everything that went wrong from his computer to the printing machine because he had little knowledge about engineering, sometimes he wins and most times failed,he continued this way till almost everything became of no use to him,at a point I started thinking he was greedy and didn't want to pay someone to repair his machines.

you spend more time in arguing your point of view against people who are trying to
help you than improving yourself, then you’re very well on your way to sucking
To succeed at anything,you must be willing to listen to people and take advice no matter how much you think you know.Not to say that you should always take advice from everybody,but its a suggestion which could help u achieve great things so you should accept them whether you believe it’s relevant or not, not arguing your way into looking like you are always right. The people who suffer from this problem tend to be highly intelligent and extremely
insecure which is bad because the more intelligent someone is, the more they’re able to rationalize their own stupid excuses to themselves, and the more their intellect is used as a defense mechanism to protect their fragile ego.

you don’t believe it’s possible
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Alot of people give up on chances that would have fetched them greatness because they do not believe in their own potentials,they dont see the possiblities of them making great remarks,they often belittle themselves and this has led to a series of little achievements in their lives.

The mind’s unconscious beliefs
about possibilities inform the level of effort and expectation of success from the body’s
behavior. For instance, one study showed that athletes who held inaccurate positive beliefs about their own abilities outperformed athletes with accurate or negative beliefs about their own abilities.

people who overestimate themselves tend to be far more likely to
actually get up each time they fail and try,and not wyn about how many times they tried and landed on their asses,they are those who see beyond their potential and belive that they are and can be better,and they actually do.therefore when you try and learn from your failures,you can eventually lead yourself to success. So, a little delusion of grandeur goes a long way.

Remember failures are trials and they are meant to be won over,there is no situation that comes your way in life that will be too much for you to handle,even God won't let you face challenges that will be too heavy for you.

Thank you.....,lol I think I broke a nail.

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The level of your mental strength some times determine whether a person can handle failure effectively or not...failure starts from the wrong mindset

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