The not so daily China boast - Edition 2
In this edition:
Hong Kong police prevent nuclear attack on China!
Hong Kong Police making friends
Beijing Railway Station Wonder
Superhuman female soldiers
The Emperor's Moments
ConfuXius says
And now: Let's all sing praise to China! Hail Emperor Xi!
Hong Kong police prevent nuclear attack on China!
As we all know, Hong Kong protesters are the worst terrorists in the world. They don't love Emperor Xi, praise be upon him, they even taunt him and desecrate his image. Look at this:
Blasphemy!
And as if that would not be enough, these terrorists now planned to explode a nuclear bomb in Beijing, just when our beloved leader was about to watch the greatest military parade ever.
The heroes of the Hong Kong police force have bravely frustrated this plan. Using most modern technology, provided of course by the best technology companies in the world from China, they could easily detect the nuclear material. Here you see a police hero wearing laser spectacles:
Using these glasses, the bomb was found being carried by a highly dangerous terrorist in his black (!) backpack. Under greatest threat for their lives, while HK youths were using extremely lethal rods & sticks, even throwing deadly bricks, one brave policeman was able to subdue the terrorist carrying the bomb by shooting at him with a very small gun, hardly making a bang:
After disabling the terrorist, the police only needed five heroes to remove the nuclear device from the rucksack and carry it to safety:
While doing so, they came under fierce attack by a highly trained female assassin. Although this killer was attacking with extremely dangerous weapons - a smartphone in her left and a purse in her right hand - the heroes of Hong Kong were able to arrest her without being injured.
The nuclear device is now safely stored in a fridge in Carrie Lam's villa. We should all praise the heroes from the Hong Kong police department for their bravery and for saving Emperor Xi, praise be upon him, from a vicious terrorist attack!
Hong Kong Police making friends
Beside bravely defying all odds in their fight against highly dangerous terrorists, the heroes of Hong Kong were again busy befriending the public.
Look at this:
https://twitter.com/i/status/1179440988621660161
The policeman playing happily with a local resident who was standing there a bit bored. Isn't it nice? & then he gets another pat on the back by a colleague of that hero.
Or this:
https://twitter.com/i/status/1179404771750490115
A local citizen, so happy with policing standards that he stands on the street and gives a speech to motivate citizens in their support of the police. Isn't it heartbreaking?
More happy citizens of Hong Kong:
https://twitter.com/i/status/1179040925441384449
They are asking the police to shoot them! That's how much they love the police. They want to feel it with a bullet in their heart.
Beijing Railway Station Wonder
As we all know, China's architecture is the greatest in the world. One of the best examples is Beijing Railway Station.
Watch this:
Truly amazing!
This station was built in 1959 and has clock towers! What's more, the loud speakers in these towers can play a tune and make bell sounds. Wonderful!
It's hard to believe, but this railway station has trains, going to other cities! There are even passengers using these trains. Unbelievable.
There are tracks and platforms, even shops. People also work there.
China is truly amazing. China's architecture is great! Let's all praise Emperor Xi!
Superhuman female soldiers
The Chinese military is the best in the world, this is well known. But now we even have superhuman soldiers. Thanks to Emperor Xi, praise be upon him, who some 20 years ago donated sperm for a soldier breeding programme, the PLA's human capital now increased dramatically. Look:
https://twitter.com/PDChina/status/1176549356884783104
This female soldier easily tears apart a stainless steel bowl. The bowl's metal is centimetres thick and of classic Chinese quality. In just a few years from now, with the new cloning programme in full swing, the whole PLA will consist of such superheroes. We will be unstoppable!
Let's all praise Emperor Xi!
Emperor Xi, praise be upon him, was very busy this week. Particularly on 1 October, the day of the founding of this great nation, he worked from dawn to dusk.
He was waving:
He was looking at the sky:
He was standing in a car:
He was standing in a car and looking at flags at the same time:
He was even standing in a car and waving simultaneously:
A truly great leader with such wonderful abilities in waving and standing.
Let's all praise Emperor Xi!
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