Wizard boy / #COMEDYOPENMIC 46

in #comedyopenmic5 years ago (edited)

The first time I realised I was a wizard, I burnt my mother's breast.

Well, the breast was saved but not the nipple. You wouldn't see a distinction between my mothers left breast and the nipple, courtesy of me.

I think my parents would think really well before keeping things from us now.

Also, that wasn't the only thing I found out on that faithful day. I was also a bastard.

So,

Wizard , check
Sexiest wizard , double check.
Stubborn bastard, triple check.

Great, right?

That was the only thing I could say after everything.

Nothing in my family ever suggested an odd thing about me. I was a normal kid like the rest. I had my mother's pleasant face and I always thought I got my height and physique from my father, I guess it was just that my mother's taste in men never changed.

I had always preferred my privacy and my private time. But, this particular day, mother wouldn't let me be. She kept making request of me until I felt suffocated. So, I ignored her.

My door flung opened with a loud bang with mother holding a pestle to hit me, all I could do was shield my head with my hands and boom!

Mother was on fire.

I later learnt I made a hand sign which was what started the fire.

Thanks to my father who saved the day.I was frozen at the sight of the fire.

After mother was seen by the doctor. My father told me all that happened. I was still shivering while he explained everything to me.

Turns out father and mother had a huge fight sometimes at the beginning of their marriage. They were separated for 6months and mother got knocked up by another man who she refers to as a magician even though he told her he was a wizard.

And it wasn't my first fire either. I burnt myself when I was little, that was when they knew I was a wizard like my father.

Hand gloves are all I received as presents for occasions now, I guess no one wants to die buy fire😉

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picture source: pixabay

for the#comedyopenmic contest.

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In an effort to try to give people more transparency and feedback on what our judges think of their posts, we thought we'd run an experiment and give people their score from teh judges.

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Yaaay...3.5/5

I guess I did something right. Thanks for the feed back.

Sexiest wizard , double check.

They'd better believe it.
So, you're like what? A fire-breathing sexy microwave freak?
So much we could achieve together. Take over the blockchain World and turn any hindrance to toast.

Can i say it now? Let me ride by your side. I love lurr you!

Lmao..

Have got a rider by my side.
But, I lurr you too. Thanks for all the wonderful comnents and your sense of humour is magic!

But, I lurr you too.

You're too kind.

Another rider? I bet he's an Ice wizard. Two real riders fulfilling R R Martin's A Song of Ice and Fire. Oh yeah, I saw your dragons on Twitter. You're a Thronie (if the word exists).

I am at the people's service to take us to the promise land.

Huhn huhn .....The night is dark and full of terrors. Winter is here but I got my dragon to melt them all😁😀

Feels like I am rapping 😉

Update your partiko now, am sure they've fixed the bugs

Posted using Partiko Android

I tried that but got the same result. The app still says "I didn't give permission."

I logged in using steem connect, do you think that's the problem?

Go to partiko discord and complain, I really wish you're using partiko

Posted using Partiko Android

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