Let's have a laugh!

Where should I start. How about I start with a joke about a dog. I mean it's a little ruff but what ever. Well what do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, he wont come to you no matter what you call him. I actually I lied, I got that dog to come to me, I had put him at the top of the hill and said "roll over"..... He told me that he has an ancient Chinese disease called draginass. Its actually really contagious I think I caught it too. You know what the dog said when they cut his tail off? "Wont be long now..."
Well that's all for today. see y'all next time I feel like telling few knee slappers. Thanks for your time.