LETTING GO

The hardest part about moving on is accepting that they woke up one day and decided that you're no longer the one, and you never got the chance to catch up with them.

It's like they realized early on that the ship is sinking so they get on a small boat and leave you behind.

Then you realize too late, but the ship is already filled with water, and you have to literally struggle to get a life jacket that actually works, jump into the freezing ocean and try hard to make it to shore.

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When you do, even all the while hoping as you swam, that perhaps they forgot- somehow, that you were still on the ship- that they'll be waiting on the shore, you get there and find out that they are gone.

They already took a bus home, and changed the locks and you're not welcome anymore.

It hits differently then
The memories don't help either.
Memories of all those times they said they'd never leave you behind and even when push comes to shove, they'd rather drown with you, than survive alone.

So, the questions start- how, what, when?
How did things change?
When did they decide they didn't want you in their lives anymore?
What went wrong?

Closures, you search for closures but get none. Because the questions still remain unanswered. Like an open sore, it refuses to heal, festering still.

Oh, but you must realise, that some things change. Sometimes, life takes a new turn, and that's not on you. It's not on them. It's just... Life. Some questions may remain unanswered. But you must choose to close the chapter, and move on.

Take a deep breath, let the memories come like a tidal wave. Let them drown you. Cry if you must, embrace your pain.

Then afterwards, you must open up and let it all go. Choose to be free. Accept what is and what is not, and smile.

As hard as letting go is, you simply need to grief, then accept. Accept that they are gone and they won't be back. Now, live for yourself.