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RE: Intermediary Scribe

in #dsound6 years ago

@d-pend,

Damn ... free verse and I actually liked it! You've poisoned my mind.

Along the summit trail, lithe early morn
When sunlight slumbers still,
I float with halting gait through dreamèd grove
Where beauty thought entrains.

Great stanza. "Lithe" is a good word. Nice alliteration in line 2. "dreamed" ... accents really matter :-) - it turns it into perfect iambic pentameter, and a beautiful line.

Perhaps the gap between could live with wings,
And I its feathering scribe—
Bestow upon our land a yearning verse

To bridge the heart between.

I really like the phrase "yearning verse" ... especially coming from a "feathering scribe."

Ethereal.

Nice job, indeed.

Quill

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