One of the main mistakes of parents is that they often forget that they are an example for their children. Therefore, everything parents do is safe, sooner or later, their children will repeat.

SourceSometimes it is not easy to raise small children! Maybe that is why parents often make mistakes and even make serious mistakes when their children do not obey.

Problems and the workload at work, daily duties and stress make parents irritated and impatient, and easily "lose control" when the naughty child stops obeying the established rules and does (as if on purpose) exactly the opposite.

And still, you need to recover, breathe deeply and do the right thing. Do not give in to emotions and do not make these mistakes, like other parents, because you can cross out everything you tried to invest in your children until now.

Errors that parents make

1. I give orders here

The main problem is that parents consider that the disobedience of their children (rude response, hysteria or failure to comply with the request) is a challenge to their authority.

SourceBut very often, children do not even think about it, they are not going to make a "revolution" and establish their own rules. They may have simply forgotten what they had said before, or misinterpreted something.

As adults, everything may seem more than simple and obvious, but we must not forget that our children are still children, even if they seem to be completely independent.

So, instead of fighting with your children for the right to command in the family, try to sit down and talk to them, explain again and again what you want from them. It is important to make sure that they understand you correctly.

Here is another error of the parents that arises from this: they always want their children to follow the established norms and rules, but they do not consider it necessary to take the time to verify these same norms, insofar as they are logical and understandable for the children.

2. Do what they do

Another common mistake of parents is anger and screaming at children for disobedience.

Source
Such behavior not only does not strengthen the power of parents, but, on the contrary, weakens it. You will only make the child feel scared, angry and disappointed. You will see attacks against yourself, instead of understanding.

And if parents really want to educate their children, we must understand that this is not the best method. So children will not hear you, no matter how loud you scream.

In addition, the child will experience stress due to the alarming and tense situation in the home, and this never leads to anything good.

3. Change of rules.

Imagine an image of this type: a child with a father or a mother is in a store and is told that today there are no "sweets".

SourceBut the child has already seen them and is eager to do it: he gets hysterical, falls to the floor, starts screaming something like: "I want a chocolate bar" or "Buy me this candy".

After the child has calmed down and the shame of the parents for the behavior of that child in a public place disappears a little, he softens and allows him to take sweets, he gives up.

It is at this time that the child realizes that the rules are not immutable ... You can "make fun" with the help of this type of manipulation (and children are great teachers of this art), as tears and screams.

If the father does this, even if it is only once, consider him lost. The rules must be the same. Either yes or no. Otherwise, the child will assume that any rule can be broken and that nothing terrible will happen.

4. Close your eyes to the obvious.

How many times did this happen to us! If we do not want to notice something or we do not like it, we just turn our backs on it and pretend that nothing happened.

SourceBut really it's not so! If the child disobeyed us and we did not tell him anything (they did not even make a suggestion), then he simply will not understand in the future why he suddenly got angry (the last time, everything was fine).

Your interest in the behavior of children should not change according to the day of the week or a particular point.

Then the child will feel our "indifference" for what he does or does not do. This can cause problems such as the child's low self-esteem and in the near future.

5. I can do this because I'm a mom (dad)

Without a doubt this is the worst mistake of the parents. You can not forbid children what you allow, just because "you are an adult".

SourceIf, for example, the father asks his son not to put his feet on the table and does it all the time, it is very likely that the child does not understand and does not obey.

If there are rules in the house, they must be the same for all members of the family. And not only to give an example, but to be coherent in their actions and ask the children what they are doing.

So try to forget about this phrase "because I said it". If they are not compatible with relevant actions that comply with a particular request, they will be completely illogical and even absurd. This is not an argument for your son!

Parents always set rules for their children, but it must be understood that the implementation of these rules is in their hands.

Ideal parents do not exist, but pay attention to these 5 mistakes in education, be a bit more critical of yourself and then it will be much easier to solve such problems in the family. This is a very important and useful step: work on yourself.

Reference:

1
2

---

Posted from my blog with SteemPress : http://oscarcede.vornix.blog/?p=148

---