His Bewildered Elf

His Bewildered Elf always kept a teapot that they would put up their bum. This might appear to be a peculiar thought, to my mum, but not to the Elf, who felt that this idea is simply life. You wouldnt have thought, a teapot was the chosen item.

His Bewildered Elf often carried a CD player that they would sometimes play with. It should be a fairly weird and wonderful proposal, to everybody you know, but not to the Elf, who had decided it was sublime. You wouldnt have thought, a CD player was the thing that was opted for.

His Bewildered Elf desperately wanted a sack of potatoes that they would often play with. One might consider this to be a weird and wonderful activity, to many, but not to the Elf, who considered that it was in fact, awe-inspring. Who would have thought, a sack of potatoes being the thing selected.

His Bewildered Elf found a helmet that they would sometimes insert somewhere. It should be a different approach to life, to me, my mum and my dad, but not to the Elf, who had decided that it was in fact, simply life. Bizarrely, a helmet was the thing that was opted for.

His Bewildered Elf often carried a dildo to sit and look at. It should have been an odd proposal, to my dad, but not to the Elf, who had come to the conclusion that this idea was amazing. Bizarrely, a dildo would be the chosen thing.

His Bewildered Elf always kept a wig that they would often rub on his belly. It should have been a fairly exciting approach to life, to you and me, but not to the Elf, who had decided it was amazing. Bizarrely, a wig of all things.