Freewrite - Accepting LIFE

in #esteem5 years ago (edited)


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This post will not be one of my usual posts. This will not be a well-thought out post - there will be nothing scripted here.

The last few weeks or so were exhausting. I was literally struggling to keep up. Do you have those days? I have a family, a job, friends and family and I also have ME and my hobbies. Because life happens and since I love life - I am trying to keep up with it all. This post is not to complain - it is just telling it like it is. I've been trying to be nurturing for my children and supportive for my friends and family - all over the world - literally - on and off line. I have also tried to keep blogging but it has been a bit of a struggle. Phew. Something needed to take a back seat. You know how it is - right?

So what was I supposed to do? One of my favourite things to do is to share with friends and family. I like being there for anyone that needs me. That is just my thing. That might be - lending a listening ear or just simply laughing, crying together or talking. The stories comes in all shades - they are not always fun - sometimes they can be stories of travels plans or birthday parties or sometimes, it is about weddings, births or deaths. It can also be about illnesses or recoveries or about the children school grades or bullying. It does not matter what it is about really - it all takes time and energy. It is just a part of life. However, the question remains? What should I do when I just feel TIRED?
At the end of a work day - sometimes there simply is no energy left. I felt discombobulated. (I have not thought of that word for a long time).

My "me time"starts ónce the children are in bed - I often blog or think of things to share on my blog or I might read as well if I think I can concentrate. However I have been too exhausted in the last weeks to enjoy my "me time "the way I use to or want to. Does anyone else have those periods when life takes over and it is all about thought and the thinking of it exhausts you? Phew!

  1. I thought about my own life after giving advise sometimes as I wondered whether my own needed fixing or
  2. I thought about my own mortality because of the passing of friends and acquaintances - young or old or
  3. I just simply thought about the way of the world and what things might be like for my offsprings.

The last 2 are too difficult- so I abandoned those thoughts very quickly. Yes, I realise that I cannot change much and that I can only do my small part but it does not matter. I decided a long time ago not to waste time and energy on the the things which are out of my span of control. However, sometimes being human is all we can be. In my own life - exhaustion was taking over and I had allowed myself to wallow in these thoughts because it is a part of life - a part of being me. I just went with the flow. I also realised that I also took time out to figure out how those thoughts made me feel. I was connecting my brain to my heart and my body. If you cannot do it by yourself - tell someone you love and trust how you are feeling. Process those feelings. :grinning:

How long can one drive oneself bonkers? I do not want to do this for too long because it will become a habit - does not seem like a good habit to me. I needed to “snap out of this”. Then I remember that I wrote about "Dancing to a different beat: Choices" - I will include the link when I am finished sharing my thoughts. :grinning: I must tell you - I recalled immediately how happy I was dancing in my living room that day and I immediately started to feel better. I remember that it rained that day and that I was inspired to look for "rain music" which I danced to - I was totally in the moment. It is too late for dancing by I can still feel the joy I felt that day. I am grateful - even for my post.

To be honest, I felt so good that I decided that I will share this personal story as I felt the exhaustion expire - literally melt away as soon as I started to think happy thoughts. I could go back to mulling over the fearful thoughts that was exhausting me but I was *choosing * to let them go and everything felt lighter.

I guess what I really want to share after this long monologue is the following

  • Allow yourself to be: all our thoughts are there - think them
  • If they lead to emotions - they all deserve attention - pay attention to them and feel them
  • After doing so - accept them - no use deny them
  • then process them (or deal with the feelings) - neither loving nor hating them.
  • thereafter figure out how to translate those feelings into something that is uplifting (maybe something that makes you smile - translate that energy in something beautiful.

I have been feeling pretty good and I will revisit that old post and share the link here. I will also use the same inspiring quote of that post as well.

I will go to bed now because I am tired not from over-thinking - it is now well past midnight. :grinning:

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😊😊😊😊
Life sometimes gets beyond our control, we try our best not to worry, not to be bothered, but worrying sneaks up on us. And it comes with slight sadness, making us forget the beautiful life we have.

I totally relate to this article, and on days when I'm over whelmed I put it all on pause. But I can't always control and pause these actions. So I look for something I love, music, food, my cousins... And I drown myself in those happy moments, and it becomes fuel for the next ride...

I love that this article ended on a lighter note. Nice one Mo

Thank you @winarobert - indeed life takes over but like you said the beauty is still there and we need to re-discover that - find that again and focus on it. We cannot allow negativity to spiral out of control - life is beautiful and too short.

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