A Proud Father!
Our oldest daughter had her last day of the school year this last week. It is has been a great year for her, she has had faced down challenges and succeeded and she has down well at school as well. There is much for a father to be proud of! Just as a little aside, the youngest is also doing great, but she is only 1, so her achievements are significantly different!
Background
Just as a little background, we send her to her a school that is not so close by but is a great school. In the Netherlands, it is common to send your child to a school that is within easy walking or biking distance. When we chose our school, we used to live closer (but still not in the easy walking/biking range), but when we bought our house, we had to move a bit further away to have an affordable mortgage for the space that we wanted. This meant that we are now a 25 minutes car ride away from the school, which is completely unbelievable for the other parents when we tell them where we live.
However, we did choose the school because it is a great school, and the fact that it is in a rich neighbourhood helps (in an ideal world, it wouldn't, but it does).... and so we thought, that in Australia, a 25 minute car ride to school would be on the lower end anyway, and that would be the sacrifice that we would make for our child to be able to go to a really very good basisschool.
A touch of sadness
We don't often feel too heavily the difference in social class/wealth between us and the other parents. I mean, there are markers, the dress, the different professions, the cars and these sort of things, but those don't mean too much to a 6 year old, it's more things that we notice as adults. However, we did see a little thing rear up today.
After we picked her up from the last day of school, she was a little sad. We thought initially that it was something to do with her leaving the teachers that had been with her for the last two and a half years, who she had loved and the teachers had also enjoyed having her in the class.
Instead, it was because some of her friends were talking about where they were going for the summer holiday seasons, and some of them were going to some seriously glamorous places for a long time. In comparison, we are going to drive to England for a week, which I think is also going to be pretty nice!
However, it was the first time that I think that she noticed a difference though, and we explained to her that we just don't have the capacity to live near the school, go on huge world wide vacations or things like that. Instead, we are happy also doing what we are doing, and we shouldn't be comparing. In any case, how many of her classmates can say that they've ever been to Australia! A few times!
It's not that she was jealous, just sad, but it passed quickly. She is such an understanding little girl, it always surprises me... but it did make me feel a little sad. But that said, I can't take her around the world every few months, but we are a happy family (so far!).
A happy girl!
...and a proud Dad!
Well, her little sister was at daycare, and so we took the opportunity to give her a present that we had been saving up for this day! She loves LEGO, since she was little she would read the instruction manuals like a story book, and now that she is 6, she will construct houses and stuff according to the manual in much less time than we expect!
So, we had a great gift for her. A congratulations for completing her Swimming Diploma, her Piano Diploma, a ballet class performance and moving into the Middlebouw (the serious part of the primary (basis) school). In addition, to being a well-behaved daughter who is such a great sister to her little sister.
A huge LEGO friends boat!
She loved it and wanted to sit down and build the whole thing straight away! I could have sat there and watched, but I'm sure it would be too embarrassing to have a proud father just sitting there... but I did pop down every now and then to see how the construction was going!
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Oh your girls are gorgeous- and sound to be real little characters! I applaud you for enablung her to get ti a good school- what a difference it'll make to her whole life.
Growing up, my parents couldnt afford holidays or expensive gifts- but it meant we really appreciated the things we did get- along with the love and devotion which meant more than anything else. The sadnesses you described did crop up- but they were fleeting and soon forgotten- whereas the special times with my parents on funny little trips locally to us made memories I still hold dear.
Amazing work on the lego there by the way- that's some gift and ability right there!
E x
This seems to be the same thing with her, the sadness was fleeting, but she really does appreciate what we can give her! It isn't that we are completely broke, but as musicians we don't compete on a financial level with lawyers and doctors and government ministers!
She is completely obsessed with LEGO! I'm always surprised that I can just leave her alone with a box and she will just figure it out herself from the manual!
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That lego set is seriously amazing! I hear you on the other stuff. I think I would be a little sad if I were comparing myself to people who can go on fabulous vacations like that. And it's always hard when your child is sad, I think. I'm terrified for the years ahead, what they'll put me through. lol! At the same time, road trips have always been freedom for me, and the absolute best thing. I think that's a wonderful trip. I'd love to drive around the UK for a week (or more)!
These sets are great! LEGO friends/elves and city... They have really made it great fun for girls as well. I remember growing up with mostly boy-orientated themes for lego. Cars, planes, castles... Although, I'm really trying to suggest that she wants a rocket ship or a plane for the next time!
I'm a bit terrified about the teen years... right now, we are doing great... but I gather the entire dynamics can change rapidly... I hope not too much!
I imagine it must be tough to have those conversations about money with your kids. I’m not quite there yet but know I will be one day. It sounds like you have your priorities in order though, and looking back as an adult she will realize that the good school was so much more valuable than an exotic vacation. And an attentive and doting father is worth more than almost anything 🙂
She is a great kid, never pushing harder if we say "no" or "something isn't possible". In the end it was just a passing sadness for her, so nothing terrible, but these things leave a longer impression on the parents!
You have beautiful daughters. And you are a wonderful parent to your children.
Thank you, they are funny little girls! It's great to watch them grow!
What a beautiful family. You should be proud.
Thank you!
Great story about your girls. And honesry will being you a long way. They’ll understand!
Thanks, they are great girls, I'm always surprised how understanding they are!
wow awesome! i didnt know youre ssg?
youre daughters are so beautiful and it must be so frustrating being a parent today, having to choose good schools for our babies and the choice to go to a rich school for wanting the best for the child. you are doing amazing and it shows! the boat is spectacular! will she take it apart and put it back together a few times? i always wondered what kids do with specific pieces like this? many blessings to you bengy, eagle
Technically I'm not ssg. I delegate to stax as an investment, and I see lots of the ssg posts which are really interesting, but I've not directly invested in precious metals!
Funnily enough, she doesn't like taking the Lego apart at the moment... She loves just playing with them as is! I guess when she is older she will start going off the plan!
@bengy ah gotcha! interesting that you posted in the link, that's usually my identifier since ppl i've seen are usually only members. gotcha re: stax and yeah seems like that makes you a member (kinda). LOL
that is funny she doesn't like to take it a part. the piece came out lovely!!
Hang on, this bit I didn't understand!
@bengy i dont get it either. LOL
i'm on fast reply and can't see the above message. no worries.
Lol! You wrote it!
@bengy i know i know ... but i'm on fast reply and can't see prior posts :p
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Thank you very much!
A suggestion for you...
Spend some time thinking about how nice it feels to easily give your daughter everything she needs without caring about cost - because you can.
Don't obsess. Just accept it and be grateful for being fortunate to always have more than you need. Then slip that picture of yourself and the feelings with it into a side pocket of your mind.
This will "put in your order" to the universe, and it will conspire to make it more of who you are; more of your reality.
Do that and you will be delightfully surprised what happens for (and to) you, my friend.
Namaste, JaiChai
Thanks for the advice! Some useful suggestions!
They grow so quick. Some schools can make all the difference, it's good to be selective. Lego is an excellent choice of course :)
Yes, I can't believe how much she has grown! It is important to have a good school, at least that is what we value, but it is only one part of the whole picture!
Lego is the best!