Ren,
I follow your work with great admiration, I think you know that. I miss many many posts from people I admire and many more from those undiscovered gems still hiding in steemit.
I have been less engaged lately. I must credit @wonderwop for leading me back to you. They nominated your piece as their favourite free write. I am a fan of your work, but this one is indeed stand out, as @wonderwop described.

It goes several layers deeper and unveils a truth and vulnerability, a relatable piece. Internal dialogue, built upon by words spoken by others and no doubt not even remembered by them, these words resonate and intensify and amplify, and can become our truth.
Drowning out the true self they can pull us under. But the beauty in your words describe a process where you no longer feel that undertow, you are not even treading water or swimming against the tide that once mapped out your flow for you, you have learnt that you can float. Float not upon the tide but above it. All the exhaustion you convey from years of ebb and flow can be heard, the tears shed unnoticed and unacknowledged in that ocean and it's currents. It took you to many places some willingly some by sheer force of the tide. Your travels have brought you to this day.
I wish you had not endured the difficulties, though your insights and the dimension and depth to which you draw from in your writing is enhanced by a life lived. I feel blessed to know you.
Once again we have benefited as readers due to your willingness to demonstrate the strength in risking vulnerability.