Callous - 5 Minute Freewrite Day 74steemCreated with Sketch.

in #freewrite6 years ago (edited)

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I think I became somewhat callous over the years.
Once I used to write a list of good resolutions for the new year and check every point I was able to accomplish during the next 12 months, but very soon I started cheating with myself, searching for ways to formally satisfy the resolutions even without reaching their substance.
Over the years, the list became more and more unchecked, the same points were recycled for the next year, while I was wondering if I could ever reach those goals. It was just a charade lasting two or three days of January...oh yes, THIS year I swear I will exercise every day until I get fit...THIS year is the good year for my graduation, THIS year I will dedicate myself more to the family, THIS year shall be the last for my stupid fears...all bullshit.
I was losing my confidence in myself, I was indulging in self-pity and incurabile sloth. Eventually, I stopped to feel bad for my failings, and I forgot every good resolution. Who cares? I am what I am (I'm Slotheye the Failorman. Twoot! Twoot!)
But... it's been a couple of years I raised my head, thanks to my friends and to my partner (I'm shy to spend the word "love" but I think that I feel is near to it), and I began to reach for those goals WITHOUT making a list or caring for it.
So, for 2018, I decided to make a new list. Perhaps I'm ready to complete it. It's a small list of small goals, I'm writing them down ad they're coming to my mind:

1- Reading more and writing more; first of all, reading, we wannabe writers and poets are all to much prone to write and forget to read other's writings.

2- Playing more roleplaying games, and talking less about it; since for me it's a job too, I can't lose the touch with the core of the hobby.

3- Taking care of my health. This includes: eating well, sleeping well, doing exercise, laughing a lot, filling myself with beauty; perhaps I could do some dental care, orthopedic visit for my knees, and blood exams.

4- Finding a new job. I have a couple of jobs, none of them is the classic 9 to 5, "safe", job. I don't earn what I need, plain and simple. I need to increase my income, there's no other way to say it. If I don't find a new job, I must invent it.

5- Staying away the more is possible from low self-esteem, shots of anger and negative thought; enjoying life, and the company of those who love me; showing gratitude.

6- A resolution for Steemit: I want to raise up my account value during this year, posting significant contents and reaching more followers, until a value of 1000 $.

7- I don't really know what to write here, but 7 is the perfect number, so I want to end with 7 resolutions...I want to do a travel to a place I never visited before.

Edit: ok, I've re-read it and I don't think anymore this is a small list of small resolutions. That's actually a lot of things, oh my... But I will do it!

I wish you a fantastic new year, fellow Steemians! May you accomplish all your good resolutions, and so may I!

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This is a fantastic resolution list and maybe instead of looking at it as resolution look at it as a list of choices you can make every day. And if not one day, the next is right around the corner.
I certainly will do my best to help you get to the 1000. There are a lot of people on Steemit who give money away and who want to support each other.
And laughter - laughter yoga, baby!!
Thank you so much for sharing this post with us!!

https://steemit.com/freewrite/@mariannewest/day-75-5-minute-freewrite-prompt-dog-hair

There's a good advice: choices, not resolutions! And laughter-yoga! Wish you the best for 2018! :D

Marco - since you are getting serious about Steemit - I think you need to take back your delegation now. It will help you with earning curation rewards to have more in your wallet. Also, really check out all the people who give away free money. for sure enter the 300-word-story. Maybe even every day. He gives good upvotes - they can be up to 20...
this is how I grew my wallet mostly - and I was lucky to have a big win when the conversion was really good... but it can be done.

Thank you, but I prefer to stick with the plan. My little delegation will stay with you until January 7th. The freewrite contest and your support have been helping me a lot to start my account. :)

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And something else to think about.
https://chainbb.com/mapforum/@accelerator/how-to-join-the-map-community-minnows-accelerator-project
I got their delegation twice in the beginning and it really helped me to get a kickstart. Plus to get the support. I told f3nix about it and then the program stopped for a while. The two of you should work out who wants to go first. Best to wait until one of you is in a round and then the next one applies. Only one can win - so, one after another and we can get the freewriters to vote for both of you in your different rounds...

Thank you for all these advices! You're precious! Today I talked with f3nix and we made a plan for Steemit. So much things to do! I don't think we will apply to MAP in the next weeks, but it's a thing we can save for later ;)

burning to know what you are planning :)

I love your list! You didn't make it a ""To DO" list but more of a Life goal list.

Like how you added laughter to the list of healthy things to do for your body. That is great for your soul and most days attainable. :D

Low self-esteem.......is a hard one and a daily struggle for me but I have found being on Steemit and in the Freewriters group, with all of you, to be helping me recognize it's something I didn't have it controlled as well as I had thought. While it's hard, I'm trying to be better at realizing I'm ..............pretty darn good at writing.........most days..... LOLLL :D

I have missed your writing while you were gone! I'm so happy you are back to writing!!!

Oh and LOVE the photo!!! and the glasses :D Thank YOU for sharing that with me!! Made me happy!!

Just know to believe in yourself and if you falter we / I are here to tell you just how wonderful you are to us all!

Well...since I don't believe body and soul are two distinct entities, I didn't feel the need to specificate. Taking care of my health is an overall concept :)

You're as always very kind, I'm still "part-time" on Steemit until next Monday, but I will do a couple of freewrites.

Do you really love that photo? LOL! I can barely look at it: I was trying to look thoughtful, and I look drugged or sick...

You look like a man that hates having his picture taken LOLL and to ME that makes it perfect! :D
it shows some of your soul.

hmmmmmm. for what it's worth.......to get a photo of myself that I like I take about 50 snapshots and throw away 50 and then take 50 more and maybe have a good one I like :D Selfies are a curse to this new tech world we live in. Just my opinion. :D

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