Once More Back To The Dog Park, Cub Reporter Middie On The Final Maneuver Of The Trump Campaign

William Southold | Opinion Columnist |The Southold Report
“Speaking fiction to power one story at a time.”

For some reason Middie insisted we take a walk yesterday, early, before I even had a chance for my second cup of coffee.

“Up and at’em, partner,” were her first words, “we got us some work to do.”

A befuddled “What?” was all I could muster.

“You’ll see, you’ll see.” She headed for the door. “Grab your jacket big guy, a little windy out there.”

So we were soon out the door, headed back to that dog park where we were the other day.

Shortly after arriving and her inspection of the outlying fences, and a little socializing, she trotted back to me. I could tell it was a proud gait.

“You see that dog over there, the bull dog?” she asked.

“The mean looking one?” I tried to clarify.

“Typical,” she said. “I do not judge dogs, or people for that matter, by the way they look. Let’s rise above stereotypes this morning, shall we?”

Properly admonished I made a silent promise to try to do better, but not before thinking, “Why couldn’t my wife have insisted on getting a cat.”

“Well, that bulldog resides in the abode of Jason Miller, Trump Campaign Senior Adviser.

I looked again. “Kinda looks like him,” escaped my mouth a nanosecond before I felt the anvil of regret hit the back of my head.

“Ah-hem.” Middie cleared her throat before fluttering her eyebrows. “Moving on. But not before allowing me to offer the observation that you truly are a work in progress.” She paused. “Would you be interested in hearing what Ledeux told me?”

“Ledeux?”

“The bulldog in question. Try to keep up, man.”

“Sounds French.”

“Just so happens, yes. From Provence, on the Mediterranean.”

“I thought all bulldogs were named Nick, or Julie, and they came from Chicago.”

“Total lost cause. But getting back to what I’m trying to tell you. Ledeux told me that the Trump Campaign strategy has all boiled down to one last move. A pathetic fake move in their end zone. Trump sees himself as ‘The Juice’, going to shake n’bake the truth and sprint 100 yards to victory.”

“Like what Jason Miller was trying to pull with Chris Wallace on Fox News Sunday, denying credible polls, making up fake “our sources” poll numbers, claiming they have this thing in the bag.”

“Exactly.”

“It’s the only strategy they have left, that and praying for a miracle Coronavirus vaccine showing up tomorrow.”

“That’s not likely to happen.”

“Sadly, tragically, no.” Middie lowered her head, and looked about as dejected as I have ever seen her. I joined her, thinking about all the loss.

It took me a while to gather myself, then I thanked Middie for her amazing reporting, and promised her an immediate raise when we got home - double her treats, and taking her off dog food - strictly filet mignon for this dog for the next week.

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Middie, waiting impatiently for me by the back door.