Yes, that's a nice example of a loving-sounding trap :)
Love as a manipulator (although that's not really love, but it's still referred to as that).

People sometimes tell each other nice stories, such as the one you mentioned... comforting, or pretty sounding stories, which make them appear kind (to themselves, and to others), and yet, IF these same stories lead to lots of unhappiness all around, then something is obviously not right.

We are not here to invent decently sounding explanations for a socially acceptable permission to be unhappy, and anyone who us preoccupied with that is wasting precious life juice.

And yes, it's not a matter of guilt or fault. Placing attention on that is, once again, a total waste of time.
You see, recognize, understand, and then act to make a change in YOUR life.
Unhappiness and unsatisfactory results quite simply mean that... make a change!

Every individual has the freedom to make that choice for themselves.
That's where that famous phrase comes into play: We cannot change others, only ourselves.

Thank you for your reply, Chris!
And now, for me...

...it's time for... silence.