Oh my gosh Joseph! That must be awful for you; I'm so sorry . . It is indeed surreal when things like murder touch your life, as you say, these are things that usually happen on the news to other people.
Unfortunately I too knew a murder victim; a beautiful girl I went to school with, went to India and met some lowlife who ended up stalking and finally murdering her at the tender age of 17.
My wife's brother was also murdered (before I knew her) when he was at Leeds university, he was just 20.
It breaks my heart when I think about the families of murder victims, the pain they feel and the trauma they go through.
I hope that some peace will come to you Joseph; once more, I am so sorry for your loss.
Peace.