Downward spiral of Addiction and beating it. PART 1

in #life6 years ago (edited)

It all started when i was 15 years old... I had just lost my father to cancer and was suffering from an extreme case of depression and anxiety attacks were a daily occurrence. It was so bad I couldn't even stay in the house I had grown up in. When I was there I was tortured by memories of him and couldn't sleep without night terrors. I would awake to a rapid heartbeat and tears filling my eyes . So I stayed with a few friends in the town closest to my home. Soon after that I picked up a few new habits. I smoked marijuana and cigarettes daily to cope with the pain . Alcohol also played a big role in my life for the next year. Then one summer day I was doing my morning routine of getting high and drinking a few swings off a bottle of tequila to get the shakes to go away when a friend of the people I lived with showed up. He was clearly under the influence of something but wasn't acting how I had ever seen marijuana effect someone. He floated in and out of consciousness on the couch and looked rather happy about it. He came to and realized I was looking at him with intrigue. " You ever been nodded before?" he asked . "Nodded?" I replied. He produced a small square of wax paper from his sweater pocket and asked for a plate . Rather curious I walked to the kitchen and went in the cupboard for a plate. Lets call him Jay , and my roommate talked in the other room. I could here my roommate ask Jay if he thought i could "handle it" and he said "we'll find out wont we". I return and hand him the plate . He dumps out the contents of the wax paper onto the plate and its a brown chunky powder. He then uses his I.D and chops up the chunks and separates it into two lines on the plate . borrowing a five dollar bill from me he rolls it up tight into a tube and snorts one of the lines with a sigh of relief and hands me the plate. Reluctant at first I slowly took the plate and set it down in front of me. " Come on dont be a pussy " he said motioning for me to follow his lead. I lean down bill in hand and sniff the powder up my nose. A tart chemical taste comes into my throat and I cough a little . "Now we wait" he said with a chuckle...
Ten mins go by and something begins to happen. My face begins to feel warm and a similar soft warmth rises up from inside my chest. I love it. I begin to " Nod" after 15 minutes . it was the most comfortable and care free I had felt in months. I felt no pain as I fell asleep with a cigarette in my hand , I woke up to my friend taking it from my hand and putting it out in the ashtray laughing at me all the while. " how ya doing there bud? " Jay ask. I could barely keep my eyes open let alone respond to his question. Then a blissful sleep followed. That was the first time I tried an opiate. It was not only an opiate but one of the strongest there is, heroine...
From then on I didn't go a single day without getting some for about two weeks . Until I ran out of money I had been saving for almost a year at the time. The first day I couldn't afford any was like hell on earth. I sweat non stop and swung wildly from feeling hot to freezing and getting chills accompanied by goosebumps. I was sick. I was sick from not having the drug in my body and it was used to it. This is when everything started to go down the tubes...

Coin Marketplace

STEEM 0.26
TRX 0.13
JST 0.031
BTC 61553.99
ETH 2881.27
USDT 1.00
SBD 3.54