Optimal Audition. Hollywood Result.

liquidsolomon (60)in #life • 7 years ago

I first signed-up for Groundlings Workshop A simply because there wasn’t the requirement of auditioning like there was for the core performance track. But this being my second time around taking Workshop A, I felt like a dummy upon learning that workshops are where performers go if they fail the audition and need to bone-up on their improv skills.

Imagine a class full of people, most of whom are professional actors bursting at the seams with performance energy. Every single one of us complaining how the 15-minute break took entirely too long and how 3 hours’ worth of class twice a week seemed too damn short! Talk about passion! Hell there was no need to talk, one could just feel it radiate at the beginning of every class. After sitting behind a computer all day improv comedy class was certainly my respite from working in an office environment. When the three weeks of instruction were up I felt listless and thought “Fuck it! The audition is two hours and the way I see it, if nothing else I get two more hours worth of improv practice.” My only problem was that I didn’t have current headshots.

Although I had informed Jowiluv earlier in the week that I would be needing headshots, the weather had been cloudy and her schedule had been hectic. Considering all the other photographers I knew were 15 to 30 miles away, I hit up Jaimers because I figured if there was anybody who would know of a photographer available on short notice, it would be a Senior Communication Studies student who was also a ΙΔ sister. Within 30 minutes she gave me the contact info of Jerri and three hours later I would have my headshot.

With the audition on Friaday May 19th at 2pm I emailed both my acting resume (as a side not never list extra work on an acting resume) and headshot to the closest print center and told them I needed glossy in the front and resume on the back. I left work at 12:00 and was at the print shop at 12:08. My jaw dropped as they rang me up for $0.92. In Hollywood that simple piece of paper would have run me $10, easy. I drove home and then called a Lyft because I did not want to have to risk getting there late while looking for a parking spot and then to have to deal with rush hour traffic after the audition concluded at 4pm.

During my Lyft to the Groundlings theater I noted that I felt completely at peace...well maybe not completely. I mean there were occasional slight flare-ups of nerves, but they quickly subsided knowing that this audition was something that I was looking forward to as a catharsis rather than a means of income. For the first time in my performance life, I wasn’t nervous nor panicking on the way to an audition. In fact, I was ready to blow the entire house down with all the energy I could feel swelling-up in my soul. I was amped and fired-up! Why couldn’t every audition be like this?

When I arrived at the theater, the Lyft driver dropped me off at the corner and I was there a clean 12 minutes early. When I entered the lobby, I heard someone call out “Ed!”. Looking to my left there was jowtolb from class. Holy crap! Talk about the deck being stacked in my favor! Not only was I amped for the opportunity to perform, but I would be doing so with friendly familiar energy as well! “thedalyprophet is coming as well!” he told me and when she arrived she immediate tells the both of us that Mckennza is on her way as well.

“Really?!?” I replied “On her Insta I see all of us having flaming drinks, then her at a fancy party with a bunch of beautiful people and then I see her in a hospital bed with a bunch of tubes sticking out of her…and now she’s going to audition? Double U Tee Eff!”

“I know, huh? She’s gonna have some explaining to do after the audition.” thedalyprophet said as her phone vibrates and exclaims “Shit that’s her…Hey! Yeah well hurry up we’re about to start…” as she pushes the door open to the bustling street outside.

A man introduces himself as David and announces that he will be running the audition. He then points to a woman at a podium brandishing a list and informing us to have our IDs ready. While in line, Mckennza walks in and I give her a warm, welcoming, encouraging, consoling hug. “Dude I just saw pictures of you laid-up in the hospital and now you’re auditioning.” I say in a hushed tone of surprise and shock.

“Yeah well I was supposed to shoot in Cabo this week but then I got a collapsed lung. So since I missed that opportunity why not go for broke with an audition, right?” she replies.

“You got this. We all got this. Jimmy taught us well!” David then opens the door to the theater and directs us to sit in the first two rows. As he is about to give an overview of the student program another guy walks in at the last minute.

“…and who are you?” David inquires.

“I’m Tim. I just signed-up 10 minutes ago.”

“Well welcome, Tim. I see you brought your headshot. In fact why don’t all of you pass your headshots to the center, if you brought one.”

From this point on the audition virtually mirrored what the four of us had been experiencing for the past three weeks. We began with simple warm-ups designed to establish connection via eye contact and active listening. David gave us a character scenario where we were all construction workers tasked to replace a roof.

“How does the character walk? Now add a sound or a word that the character makes…now someone has just asked you what you will need to get the job done. When I give you the word, at a level 10 you are going to project to the 4th wall (the audience) with the dialogue of the character. GO!”

It’s wonderful and comforting to experience something that is familiar. Again, we had done this exercise several times throughout the workshop both projecting like we had been asked and interacting with other characters (members of the class). Even more ironic was the fact that I had had the experience of replacing a roof 18 years ago giving me the knowledge of removing the old shingles with a “roof bully”, securing dumpsters, applying cold tar for adhesive, then laying each one of shingles and nailing them in by hand.

Following that exercise he divided the class into two groups. Each of which was tasked with telling a story. The caveat was that when David would point at someone who would need to make-up a story, after an random amount of time he would point to someone else who would carry the story picking right where the last person had left off. All the while keeping track of continuity, characters and actions within the as the story progressed. My group went second and the story that was started by David was about an old house on a cul-de-sac. As the story progressed the character went to investigate a noise in a room and that’s when David pointed at me as I felt all my nervous energy explode in voice and facial expression.

“…and the room was full of MICE! All scurrying about uninterested that the door had even been open. Something was keeping the mice confined to that one room.”

…and that’s all I got out before he pointed to someone else. Interestingly enough though, I noted that he only pointed at me once. Whereas he was pointing at others several times during the exercise.

The audition finally progressed to two person scenes where the actors were given a place and a context. thedalyprophet got a familiar scene between a mother packing her son off to college. I smirked at this because just the week before she had done a similar scene in class where she was cleaning up after a party that had been thrown the night before. I was happy for her that she was able to draw on a scene that was somewhat familiar to her. jwtolb and Mckennza had the good fortune of drawing each other as scene partners. In addition to being classmates, they had also done at least one scene together during the workshop. The scene they were given were two airline attendants prepping food during a flight. I thought they pulled the scene off nicely.

As luck would have it I went last with Tim who I had reservations about. I mean when he said he signed-up for the audition 10 minutes prior to class I found that extremely suspect. Because I worked-up enough nerve to sign-up last Monday and wanted to communicate that to the rest of my workshop class the next day to invite the familiar energy we all shared. However when I went to grab the reservation link the class was already booked solid. Furthermore being seated in the lobby facing the wall of headshots for the current Groundlings cast in the main program, I thought he bore a striking resemblance to one of those headshots.

Was Tim a ringer?

Not having time to process this, it was my turn. David asked everyone who went on stage a little bit about themselves. For myself I let him know that I had previously taken a workshop with Sean Hogan many moons ago and that I felt I was finally ready to audition. Tim on the other hand indicated that he was “doing the acting thing” and currently studying at the Beverly Hills Playhouse Acting School.

To me the situation of being the last to go for a two- person scene seemed apropos as it had happened the week before as both the youngest and oldest person in the class had the final two-person scene for the workshop. Jimmy said the one scenario that always seemed to be given was between a plumber and a customer because it was somewhat difficult to come-up with material. However the nature of improv being what it is, David opted to give us the scene of where Tim and I were two 90 year old men in a nursing home on new years eve. Tim was directed to deliver the first line of dialogue.

Quite frankly I don’t remember much about what happen when I get in the moment on stage, I am in complete Zen. I do remember that my character was separating pills into a weekly pill box while Tim’s character was flipping through channels on the TV. I do remember that my name was Saul. I remember committing to a Brooklyn Jewish intonation because of this and that Tim’s character wouldn’t shut-up. So my character (forgot the name) just listened and accepted being interrupted until David shouted out some direction to me.

“Ahh but those baths he likes to get make him crazy. Why do they make him crazy?” Me: “You go crazy every time. It’s those Epsom salts! They got you jumping off the walls and wanting to chews peoples faces off, Saul! (awkward pause at the realization of my error) Holy shit I just called you Saul. Maybe it’s me that needs to lay off them Epsom salts.”

David then yells “and scene!” and begins to clap as the rest of the class joins him.

As Tim and I seat ourselves in the theater, David says: “Well that concludes the audition. Thank you very much for coming and the results should arrive within the next three days.”

As I left with my workshop peeps, I snapped an Insta.

We then head to a coffeehouse just down the block where we catch up on the past week and where we were all going next. Although cordial it is easy to get caught up in the banal minutia of life. Simply put I my mind was focused on the drill weekend the next day where I had to run the PRT and get my packet together for a Navy Reserve Direct Commission Officer – Public Affairs program.

This means I all but forgot about the audition until I got the email on Monday.

Reaching out to the other audition peeps I discovered that despite all of us having attended the same workshop and the same audition, only jwtolb and I were selected to continue to the core curriculum. I was seriously dumbfounded by this news. I felt every one of us did a fine job to simply attend a basic class. But then again, this wasn’t the local campus improv troupe, this is Hollywood. Where one is paid $1000 for a kiss and $0.50 for their soul. It shattered my illusion that the audition was simply going to be a cakewalk and that we would be seeing each other in a future class. So yeah, I am happy certainly happy with the outcome of being able to continue but with me leaving for Hawaii in 6 day to participate in Tropic Care 2017 for two weeks and then spending 4th of July with family in Arkansas, I am thinking that the soonest I can start class is in August.

Life goes on.