I NEVER FORGOT IT, AND I DOUBT THAT I GOT TO DO IT

Very good morning to all. As always I introduce myself, my name is Marram and today I come to share something that has happened for many years in my life and a few days ago I took a different path, something I would like to tell to release a bit of what I feel, of a problem that can be partly a pain of love and nostalgia.

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The beginning of this story dates from about 10 years ago, when I was studying in school, I met a young lady in my room who at first sight seemed very beautiful, intelligent and of my same age, spent time and for reasons of the destination one day my family moved to another part within the same sector and casually near where she lived.

Although we did not talk much before that, when we started to accompany us on the way to school and back we started a great friendship, I began to know her and her family more, I felt that feelings towards her grew, although her family and she was Extremely religious. I was not able to tell him my feelings, since I thought that this great difference of beliefs could affect us, unfortunately he was right.

We finished school and we lost contact for a while when I entered the university and she did not, but again the destination made its own and a year after moving away she entered to study civil engineering in a university just 2 blocks from mine. We started talking again, we did work together, we took the same transportation home. But after a year like this something changed, she began to make more friends and I began to move away from her daily life, even when I spoke to her I noticed her distantly and began to read a book or make excuses not to meet me. It hurt and bothered me a lot at first since I did not feel I had done anything that bothered him, I always tried to be a good friend with her. Time passed and we distanced ourselves a little bit, until the day I finished the subjects in the university and I was preparing to start working practices, I could no longer see my friends (including her) in the same way I had been doing it, but thanks to Social networks did not completely lose contact with everyone.

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Months later, through these same social networks we had a discussion about political issues, again the difference of beliefs that had always raged and she and her family blocked me from networks and any other means by which we had contact. I felt extremely bad, since it was not something that led to that extreme, I felt it was the excuse since it was so distant towards me in the last few occasions that we saw each other as if my mere presence bothered him.

I remembered her occasionally and checked if she still had me blocked, the sadness began to change because of a kind of anger since I always tried to be a good friend with her, always with a smile and trying to make her smile too, our friendship of so many years was broken by something that I still think, it was nonsense. For her maybe my friendship was never worth so much.

A year passed without knowing anything about her, but even if I was a bit annoyed inside I missed her quite a lot. One day on Facebook I received a request for friendship from her, I was glad to see her but I did not know if it was right to accept her again, after everything that happened I felt it was best to get away. I could not resist it and after a few days I accepted the friend request.

We talked again and he told me that he wanted me to collaborate on something, to fix a teddy bear that I loved very much, since internally it had electronic circuits and they broke down, and being "trusted" I could hand it over to fix it.

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I did not want at first, but I insisted that there was no one else who could do it, maybe because of the friendship we had or what I came to feel for her made me accept it. I repaired it and I gave it to him, I even charged him some money for the work done, in order to deliver the message that our friendship was not the same as before.

Although she and I still have contacts in various social networks we have not chatted again, as I mentioned before I feel that the best thing is to get away, I do not even look at what she does in her networks, I did not want to feel uncomfortable or tempted to talk to her again.

10 days ago something that I consider strange happened, since I do not follow him on Facebook, I got a post from him. Some photos in the register with a young man and their families, they had married.

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I do not know why it hurt so much, until that moment I felt that I did not feel anything for her anymore, that our friendship had come to an end, but even being 24 years old and without doing it many years ago, I had a strong desire to cry seeing her there starting A life with someone else, I managed to contain myself since I was working.

From how much I came to know her, I know that the man she chose to start a new life is a great person and I'm really happy to see her happy, but it hurt me that after all we lived, I did not go nothing significant for her, I was not even informed that I would take this important decision and if it were not for that error of facebook I would not even have known.

I think that after seeing her new commitment, we have distanced ourselves even more than before, and when noticing these new feelings of pain, I noticed that I never stopped loving her even though I pretended to do it. I only wish her the best and that if she managed to establish a relationship like that after getting away from me, I'll let her stay that way and be happy with her new husband, maybe my presence will affect her after all.

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There is no conclusion in this story as in the others that I told you, I want to clarify that I did not write all this for selfish reasons or to speak ill of it, I just wanted to tell it, like when you tell a friend your problems, since I really do not have to Nobody to talk to about these matters, it was usually she who was listening to me and vice versa.

Up to here I will leave my story, I hope this is a close in my life and start another stage. Thank you for reading what I had to say, have a happy day and remember that @Marram has spoken to you. For the next time I will bring something more cheerful, I apologize if I have bothered you or made you feel bad.