Been a While

in #life6 years ago

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I know I haven't posted in a while so I'm sorry about that. Life has just gotten in the way and I guess I've been getting a little sidetracked. If you didn't already know, I'm a master procrastinator. Even now as I'm writing this I'm getting distracted by every little thing. It probably doesn't help that I've got the TV on in the background, maybe I should turn it off.

OK it's off. I've been rewatching American Horror Story and I forgot how much I love it. It's so different from any other series and it's really binge-worthy. So apart from watching it pretty much 24/7, I finished the novel I was reading and spent way too much money online shopping.

But, there's one thing that's been bothering me lately and that's peoples opinions. For example, my parents are very judgemental and opinionated. Don't get me wrong, I love them to bits, but sometimes they can upset me without realizing it. Today I was shopping with my mum whilst wearing a new dress I'd brought a few weeks ago. The dress has turned out to be too big for me and is quite long, it sits just above my knees. Usually, I like to wear something a bit shorter but recently the self-consciousness has gotten out of control. Anyway, my mum said how much she liked the length and how anything above that length just doesn't suit me. She's told me countless times that shorts don't suit me (She's told me this since I can remember), short dresses or skirts don't suit me and if I EVER curl or have a slight wave in my hair it definitely doesn't suit me, as well as any makeup.

Basically, I feel trapped. I feel like the only things I can wear are dresses AND she only likes it when I wear them with tights or leggings, never showing any skin. I should probably mention that I've always had bigger legs and am not confident at all. I honestly hate my legs but when I get dressed up to go out, my parents can't help but put me down just before I leave. It makes me feel like shit about myself. All I can wear are dresses & tights with straight hair and no makeup. Does anyone else feel trapped?

It's not just my parents, everybody judges. Whenever I'm in public I feel eyes on me, I feel uncomfortable. I know that not everybody is looking at me but it just feels that way sometimes. I guess once I gain some confidence it'll be different. Anyway, that's my rant over.

Until next time,

Meliss

Photo Cred: https://funnyjunk.com/Its+been+a+while/funny-pictures/5598535/

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