My daughter is now an adult, yet having raised her as a single parent since she was a year old, parental anxiety is no stranger to me. One approach to counter it was to follow that less practiced spiritual path ... karma yoga.
Erich Fromm outlines the different chapters in our lives that helps us naturally step outside of the ego as we place others before ourselves in, his wonderful book, The Art of Loving.
Children are a major chapter in that natural awakening process; arriving normally after having lost ourselves in the love of the person who helped created them.
It sounds like you know what needs doing. May you find the needed strength to get there. 🕉
Indeed, I know what I need to do, it's a matter of doing it. I think carving out some "protected" meditation time, where the kids know they can't bother me unless it's an actual emergency, is a good first step. Maybe I should do that right now, before I head to bed. ;) Thank you for the kind comment, and for sharing this wisdom from your perspective.