Cleaning day

After much delay I decided that there is absolutely no way for me to clean this place alone.
I need help.
I need it fast.

I might be able to keep relatively clean once I get to a decent level of cleanness but no more. That's why I picked up the phone and called...GASP!...a professional.
She answered on first ring:
"What can I clean for you today?"
"ugh..is bad..is bad...I am not sure is safe to talk on the phone.."
"SIR, please calm down, there is nothing we never dealt with before"
"no, I think this is beyond anyone's power. I am not sure I can even burden you with this job. It's too much.."
I wanted to hang up and accept my faith but her calm voice brought a glimmer of hope in my life.

"I assure you, I can handle it. Now let's talk location and square meters"

It was surgical from here on. We agreed on payment, a day, the tools necessary for the job, the time it will take, the sacrifices we all must make. I hanged up, my day brighter, my optimism at a new high. This might just work out.

Then I remembered...I forgot to tell her about John.

John, is my unintentional roommate. An 8-legged spider that is working ceaselessly everywhere. His webs are stuff of legend. 3d invisible structures, punctuated by death mosquito caught and rotting in its inescapable grip. I last counted about 35 mosquitos in just one place. I just do not have the heart to kill him or his webs.
Sometimes I must, but always make sure he survives.

I worry he won't make it alive out of this one. I am not sure I can negociate his life with The Professional.

Then I remember we all have to make sacrifices and accept that lives will be lost, fished will be poisoned, things will be inhaled..all in the name of cleanness.

It's go time today.

I hope I'll return to tell the tale.

If not.

It was John. He got us all.