Why Veterans Should Write Their Stories

Today in "Writing After War" I am talking with a group of veterans about why writing about their experiences is valuable. Marjorie Eastman is a veteran who wrote The Frontline Generation: How We Served Post 9/11. She says the following:

It’s not about you. Yes, it’s your story, but at the end of the day, it’s for them. You know who I’m talking about. There is someone in your life who desperately wants to know what you’ve been through as a veteran.

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In my class, I tell my students I am that person. I have no experience with war other than my father being an accidental refugee. Of course, this comes with its own scars including the waiting, albeit on the other side of the world in a safe place, for the bombs to fall. Staring at the phone willing it to ring or not ring in the mornings. Crying if the phone rang in the middle of the night because it was certainly not good news.

There is much survivors of violence, incest and other abuses have in common with veterans. We all learn to keep our heads down and push through to stay alive. To process later (if at all). We have places in our minds where we can store our trauma, but there are major differences between what a veteran experiences and what a civilian does in times of war.

For those who serve on the front lines, movies, TV and video games do little to actually translate their experiences so those of us who haven't been a military presence during war can understand. We (civilians) are at a disadvantage when it comes to bridging the gap. This is because the military not only has its own code, it has its own language. Each war zone has its own language. Each year, training location, branch and more have their own language that has to be broken down for the non-military adept to understand.

And we need that. We need to understand. Regardless of the country we live in, there is a strong likelihood someone we love has been exposed to warfare. If we can bridge our knowledge, we can make a compassionate connection with other humans who may be struggling the same way every other survivor has--who are suffering guilt and shame and grief. Who are still trying to survive.

I am anti-war. That does not mean I am okay with not understanding the experiences of veterans. Many of them are anti-war, but they still did what they needed to in order to stay alive and keep others alive. I can listen. I can learn the right questions to ask. I can begin to see these individuals as humans with as many complications as I have. As many emotions. As much pain. As much right to be valued despite and because of their experiences.