that only cares about your hair being nice and shiny.

Well, to be fair there is really not much else to worry about in life. I mean if you think about it with all the fake news floating around it could be that maybe we should worry about world hunger and wars less and worry about having our hair perfect more. I mean when is the last time you saw anyone in a war zone or homeless shelter with perfect hair? I will help you out, Never. Why? Because being beautiful makes you only have first world problems like Starbucks putting the sticker over your name on the cup so you can not take a selfie. I watch Ned cry himself to sleep every night because in the last year his stake went from being worth $250 million to just over $1 million. Now Ned can survive just fine living in a cardboard box but that 1 million will not last very long for me. I am a high maintenance item and need my 3x daily scalp messages and special shampoo made out of baby seal tears.

Do you know how much ventures into the Antarctic cost? On top or that we have to ship Amy Shummer (she is the only one with enough blubber to survive Antarctic conditions) down there to perform for hours on end to get the seals to cry. Plus food costs for Amy are astounding. So please brother. Lets all pray for $4 steem again or else you may see me on the cover of National Geographic next time being devoured by a Lion.