Hardwired is a concept that needs to be uprooted, and a stroll down feral child lane will demonstrate that we have nothing "hardwired" and are as malleable as ever on a "brains" level.

Ultimately it's all about perception, because beauty is in the eye of the beholder, hence why pain is pleasure for some, why fear is courage for others and why doubt and insecurity is other's companions. Going to war with yourself is indeed grueling, so to flip it on it's head and to walk away from conflict is to accept and surrender.