Selfless good deeds
“How could something originate in its antithesis? … The unselfish act in self-interest? … Such origination is impossible; and he who dreams of it is a fool, indeed worse than a fool; the things of the highest value must have another origin of their own.” -Friedrich Nietzsche
Before watching this episode I was sure that selfless good deeds do exist.. I have never considered that getting satisfaction from your deed could actually make it "selfish", since self-interest is involved. Of course I can totally understand the funny approach to this subject in FRIENDS but it definitely made me think more about it...
Selfishness is a dominant force in nature; an inevitable symptom of the "survival of the fittest" mantra. So is it possible for someone to act in a manner that is not motivated, directly or indirectly, by self-interest?
It seems that in many cases where someone is being kind, he is actually performing in a manner that will benefit him. Either the recipient of the kindness will reciprocate, or the act of kindness itself is deemed commendable. Therefore, the one who offered the kindness still benefits personally from their action. Every "selfless" act, in some way, may benefit the one being "selfless".
I once had a very interesting conversation with a family friend who is a psychiatrist -by the way he is one of the most inspiring persons I have ever met in my life. We were talking about several things, one of which was the above, focusing on the literal interpretation of the "selfless" part of any of our acts or else "altruism".
My mum told him that loving me and taking care of me is a selfless deed, since she has nothing to benefit from. He then said that this is not considered selfless, as the reason for doing so is because I am her child and if I were any other person she wouldn't do the same. That kind of relationship somehow "obliges" you to act this way. You want to be that "good mum", who wants to be proud of herself, of her role and wants HER child to be proud of HER. Moreover this protective and caring behaviour leads to pleasant feelings and relieves the unpleasant ones such as the guilt or shame of not behaving that way.
After some seconds of silence I told him that I found a selfless deed -a silly one maybe. If someone was about to kill my parents I would happily sacrifice myself to save them. Then again he replied in an unexpected way.. "You would not do that to save them you would do that to avoid the pain of their loss and in that case you are not even taking in consideration their pain". And he was right. Even "sacrificing" yourself for someone is being done for your own sake.
After many failed examples and a quite long conversation we came to a different conclusion though.. A conclusion that had to do with the core, with the meaningful or most important side of this subject. That ourself is always involved since whatever we do has an emotional impact to us -consciously or unconsciously- therefore there is always self-interest in any of our acts. But what really matters is to "feed" this self in a positive way through good deeds. Through actions that trigger happiness and bliss in the wake of them. The desideratum is not to be selfless. Is to leave a positive mark to us, to others, to the world..
So after all there might be a level of altruism that exists and it would be wrong to deny that...
Selfless good deeds is indeed an interesting topic, one that I have never found adequately discussed in Western thought.
One tradition that seems to take that question most seriously is that of the Malamatiyya, followers of the Path of Blame. They consider that doing good deeds almost inevitably feeds one's ego, the opposite effect to that desired by one pursuing a spiritual path.
I gather that they developed techniques to counter the tendency:
IX. MALÂMATÎ PRINCIPLES
The main principle on which the Malâmatî Path is based requires that one always behold one's self as blameworthy. Rather than being an ethical postulate, this principle stems primarily from a psychological understanding of the nature of the self. The 'self', or more accurately the 'lower self' (nafs), is understood by the Malâmatî mystics as being the tempting element in the psyche, al-nafs al-ammâra bi'l-sû': 'the soul which prods one to evil' and in this capacity it functions as the agent provocateur of Satan, the lusts and all evil inclinations. Yet it is also understood as the centre of ego consciousness. Most mystical systems agree that the more one's energy is absorbed in satisfying and gratifying the requirements of the ego, the less energy can be put into the process of psychological and spiritual transformation...."
https://goldensufi.org/a_ss_malamati.html
I haven't heard of the Malamatiyya before and it was very interesting learning about them!! It makes sense.. By reminding yourself your imperfections and being able to take blame you can get closer to the "higher" self. Although it might look like a "painful" or difficult path, it could work, since you focus less on you -and everything fabulous about you that can be quite destructive..
In Eastern Christianity it is also believed that you should not communicate a good deed with others since there is a temptation to brag about it. Therefore it loses its initial aim..
I believe that there are truly selfless deeds. The fact that something produces a benefit does not necessarily make us do such an action for that benefit, that's a sophism. Something can effectively benefit us, however, since that is not the reason why we do the action, then it can be selfless.
When someone sacrifices himself for his children, for his parents, or for people close to him, we can't even affirm that he is being rational, it can be something merely instinctive, therefore, the reason is not in the "benefit" but simply there is no reason. And if there is no reason to do such a thing, we can say that it was a truly selfless act.
I do believe that there are selfless deeds, besides the fact that we may get satisfaction from them.. Just the literal interpretation of it might seem "wrong" since our self is always involved somehow..
This is true and I really liked the way you approached it.. :)
Thank you for your beautiful comment! :)
Αν αποβάλουμε τον εγωισμό μας, θα δούμε τη ζωή με άλλο μάτι… αλλα πουυυυυυυυ ο σατανάς μας αφήνει??? :P
Αυτό είναι μια ΜΕΓΑΛΗ αλήθεια....
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