I'm only happy when...

in #philosophy6 years ago

Since the markets are a little bleak and Steem is acting up, let's talk about happiness. Are you happy? Are you sure? How do you know? It is interesting to think about in my opinion as for the most part, even though people pursue happiness and want their children to be happy, there really isn't much of a way to judge other than feelings and, they are about as subjective an indicator as one can possibly have. On top of this, there is likely a spectrum of happiness that comes into play which means, as experience changes, one can become used to the new normal and require a greater degree of happy to have the same feeling of happiness.

My view of it is that the pursuit of happiness is much more a desire for progress and ownership than an actual state of well-being. Happiness, like sadness, is fleeting, it cannot last no matter what one does, feels or thinks. It is just another feeling that will move on when circumstances change.

I also find that what most people think will make them happy is rarely what actually does or at least, seems to through observation. We live in a society of individuals who are hellbent on working until they don't have to work anymore and no matter how much one has, there is never quite enough to not need anymore. It could be money, things, space, time but, there is always something more required. Is this a state of happiness?

From my own experience and observation/discussion with others, the times that people are the happiest are in reflection of when they have done the hardest work, either mental or physical like a sport. Times where the concept of the flow state has been present and while in that moment (what would be the now) there were no attentional resources to spend considering emotion states. Only in reflection could they recognize they were happy.

This makes happiness not in the present but, a reflection of the past of a point in time that was intense enough that there wasn't the opportunity to consider the feelings of doing it. This is interesting, isn't it? That happiness is not living in the present but a reflection of what was. It might have just been a moment ago but, once attention is brought to feelings, it is always going to be an evaluation of either the past or, the expectation of the future. Never the now because in the now, there is no chance for thought other than on what one is doing.

Essentially, every time we notice our feelings, we take ourselves outside of what we are currently doing and into a state of thought, not action. There is nothing wrong with this but it is interesting to note and it is also why people have trouble meditating as, they have the thought they need to clear their head rather than relax attention to catch a glimpse of the now. I am not a meditator in the traditional sense most of the time and everyone who is, can approach it in different ways.

For me, meditation is the space to do without having to think about doing. It might just be sitting there or, it might be in a state of intense action where thought is no longer required and the body can move with environmental sensitivity in unison with the needs of the moment. But, that is my perspective on it and to each their own.

We all want to be happy, we all want to experience the positive over the negative but we spend much more time trying to avoid what we see as negative without considering what the positive actually is. We focus so intently on what is stopping us from being happy that we often do not act toward actually being that, even if only in reflection.

Perhaps happiness is the recognition that you don't know what you have until it is gone but even though it indicates what makes you happy, the missing of it is what takes the focus, not the creation of an environment where it can be developed.

The one thing that is consistent with the people I have met who are the hapiest in reflection is that they are also the ones who are nearly constantly moving, creating, developing, thinking, living. Those who sit and do what their intuition says should make them happy, consuming, are among the unhappiest people I meet. Of course, they credit their unhappiness to other factors and use it as an excuse why not to move. Everyone has their own path and no matter if all evidence points to action over standing still, most stand still as the ingrained program of retire one day is so ubiquitous.

When I talk about these things, people always only look at the work aspect which most people frame as a negative but, it is in all motion where possibility lays. And possibility means that there is variation and sensitivity can adjust and movement evolve. People sit there looking at those working hard considering that they are unhappy due to the workload, while question the world why they have no meaning or purpose in life.

Those working hard however have the chance at finding new pathways that lead onto other pathways and live a life filled with service to action, a life lived in motion. A life lived. If they do ever take the time to reflect on their experience, they will likely find a life filled with all kinds of meaning value. When the consumers look back, all they see is what they have eaten and how little life meaning they have to show for it.

Due to the current nature of society, we are continually ramping up consumer mentality and because it is so compelling and intuitively feeds the desire that one day, one will have enough, people buy-in thinking that happiness will eventually arrive. Reflection will tell a different story for the active and the inactive.

People blame their feelings on the external, they complain about the state of the world and why nothing can be done while, others act on the doing. Perhaps nothing can be done, perhaps life is futile but, unless one wants to check themselves out, a life filled with meaning has more value to the individual than one filled with consumption which, ironically fulfills someone else's purpose.

Are you happy? Are you sure? How do you know?

Taraz
[ a Steem original ]

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Sudden fulfillment of pent up desire is conducive to an intense but short-lived flare of happiness. For a less intense but deeper feeling of happiness an opportunity to live a purposeful life according to one's own values is needed.

I think a lot of people sit and eat while waiting for inspiration to strike and provide purpose. I haven't ever seen that work.

I think even more people are unable to follow their dreams because of their circumstances. This is why I always tell younger people to try and fulfill their potential before getting married and having children or even getting seriously involved with anyone. Young adulthood is a terrible thing to waste doing what is expected of you or being tied down by responsibilities. Once you have a family taking up all your money and all your time, you can forget about it.

Not really happy, but planning on making a big life change, so hopefully soon

A change is as good as a holiday they say and I actually think, much much better if it is a step on a path to where one aims rather than an avoidance of not being there yet.

I'm happy when I'm spending quality bonding time with my daughter. The rest of the time I'm stressed. lol

Maybe the stress is because we have to do so much so that we can have some time with the kids.

For me, gratitude is the fastest way for me to feel happy. I think about all of the good things in my life and try not to focus on the negative. Hope you're doing well @tarazkp!

Gratitude is definitely part of the process and comes after the reflection :)

Hi taraz. I know when I am happy when I feel comfortable inside. You have fewer worries and everything is panning out as planned. You can be happy in life but with underlying worries and stress they seem to damper the happy mind. It is not materialistic at all but a sense of being on the right path.

It is not materialistic at all but a sense of being on the right path.

I think this is happiness (contentment) as even in the struggles, there is the feeling of what one is doing has greater meaning.

Good morning, this topic is very important and I think that today I will write about it, because it is a recurring theme. I know people who put themselves on a very high level of what it is to be happy and never are. Others, on the other hand, think that happiness is in the small moments that provide them with well-being. I think that eliminating the feeling of unhappiness is very complicated, so try to enjoy the small daily events so you do not miss them later.

Happiness is a very complex word in my view and a relative term as well. I have seen people living in extreme poverty being very happy and people living in huge Bungalows suffering from depression and anxiety..

I think the idea that it is complex stops many people from experiencing it as they look at the complexity as impossibility and feel small, rather than active. People tie their happiness to having something, this means it is external and uncontrollable.

My view of it is that the pursuit of happiness is much more a desire for progress and ownership than an actual state of well-being

This speak volume.

This makes happiness not in the present but, a reflection of the past of a point in time that was intense enough that there wasn't the opportunity to consider the feelings of doing it.

There is a saying that life must be lived forwards and understood backwards through introspection/reflection. It's in those moments we evaluate our experience/life. And the resulting effect from such a process is either regret or happiness

Everyone thinks they're happy. And I find that the people who claim to have it the "best" have it the worst (are most unhappy).

They buy into the fake it til you make it ideals without understanding that the faking still means action is required, not just talking about being it.

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