Turn-key (or three unanswered wishes)
I wish I knew how to fix you,
But I don't.
I wish I knew the order in which
I put your pieces together.
But I don't.
And I scream and I hit you,
And I beg you to be happy.
You've got everything,
I say.
But your eyes got dust in them.
Now they're all cloudy,
And I can't get them clean again.
I wave to you,
From behind your speck-filled eyes,
But you refuse to see me.
You won't let me in,
So I can't let you out.
I love you,
But I don't know how to build you into someone happy again.
So, I dismantle our castle,
I turn the key and I leave.
Halfway down the road, I worry.
What if you suddenly get happy,
And want to break free?
What if, in your delirium,
You jump from the window
In order to find me?
A couple dozen steps,
And I understand you never will.
This is very deep @honeydue! It could apply to so many situations/people in life.
Thank you, Eric :) I'm glad you found something in it. How are you? How did your story go?
Posted using Partiko Android
All is good here! I’m going to be traveling a lot through early October, which makes me happy. I’m also starting on a children’s book series based on mindfulness. Still no word on the short story. I have some ideas to make it better so I may perform “surgery” on it again. I’d be happy to send it your way if you’d like to read it. I could use another opinion on it. Other than that I’m trying to get used to the “new Steemit”. How are you?
Oh that sounds so cool - both the children's series and the traveling. Will that be US-based or abroad? :)
Oh sure, I'd love to read it :)
Aah it's a tempting loop, isn't it? To keep coming back, keep making it better. I've been wondering about that lately - when do you just let it be as is? Because it seems to me you might always find some way to make it better and you'd bet stuck in a never-ending loop. What do you think ?
I'm good :) got some traveling planned too :) Leaving next week and not quite sure when I'm coming back. Excited. Scared. All that. Writer-wise pretty good too, I feel like I'm really getting somewhere, you know? Like a story is really taking shape.
I just wrapped up a short trip to Montreal and my wife and I will be heading overseas in about ten days. : )
Perpetual editing is tempting! I just have a certain unsettled feeling until a piece is truly done. When it's done I have this wave of satisfaction that I've given it my all and I don't have that feeling quite yet with this story. If you email me at [email protected] I'll send you back a link to it. I'd be interested in your opinion.
Exciting about your travels and your writing! Where are you headed? What kind of story are you working on? There's no better feeling that the excitement of working on a piece that's going well, you kind of eat, sleep, and dream it.
Emailed ya :)
Yeah, I guess you're right. When it's done, you just know (hopefully).
Uu overseas sounds like great fun! You enjoy yourselves! And you're traveling all the way into October?
I'm off to Paris on Monday :) Seems like such a beautiful, bohemian city. Just perfect for the sort of adventure trip I have in mind.
Well, I've got one novel-length story that's currently just settling. Edited once and will get back to it when I come back. And it was really weird and annoying at times, but I'm really happy where it's going. I'm not sure where it qualifies just now - it's people meets dystopia meets dark humor. :D If that makes sense.
Cool, thanks!
We'll just be gone for a few weeks, into the first week of October.
Oh, Paris, that would be so much fun! I've never actually seen the city, I was only there for a short layover at the airport on the way to Lisbon for SteemFest2. What an inspirational city to write in.
Congratulations on getting that novel-length story done! It sounds interesting. If you can get a solid novel drafted you can accomplish anything as a writer. Is this your first one?
Have a great time in Paris!
Sorry it took me so long to reply to this one, these days I can't seem to catch a breath.
Truth is, on the one hand this poem left me almost unscathed, because even though I can guess what you're talking about, I've never experienced it first-hand. On the other, it filled me with sadness, because once again you speak from the perspective of someone who has a lot of lucidity and is kind of the stable element, and your feeling of powerlessness is something I'm familiar with, especially when it comes to attempting to "fix" people in a way that's just not possible.
It was ultimately a very powerful picture. Thanks for sharing it :)
Wanting to fix someone's just the absolute worst. I have that tendency too, to know just what to do to fix them. I never take into account that they might not want to be fixed, or that maybe my way just makes them more broken.
Thank you :)
Congratulations @honeydue! You have completed the following achievement on the Steem blockchain and have been rewarded with new badge(s) :
You can view your badges on your Steem Board and compare to others on the Steem Ranking
If you no longer want to receive notifications, reply to this comment with the word
STOPVote for @Steemitboard as a witness to get one more award and increased upvotes!