Thank you for sharing your lovely words with us, it was painful to read. Not painful as in terrible, but painful as inducing an emotional response. That is all we can hope for in writing or storytelling, that it has the potency to affect others, even if only in tiny ways.
We certainly all have our own demons to face, in endless battle. Some pull as backward into deep chasms, and some pull us forward, upward into the heavens and blind us to the jagged cliff.
I wonder... Is there a chance that your demon's name, Malachite, has a root in מלך? A fallen king, sometimes ruler of emotion?
"Melekh" did not have a conscious effect on Malachite's name, but it's possible (BTW, "Melekh" means king, just that), though it's possible the Molekh, which I wrote a piece of poetic prose about before, had more of a part in the naming.
And thank you. Having an emotional impact is all a poet should hope for, right? Well, I hoped to get the feelings out there, and then to be understood, as much as we all wish to be understood, and in spite of the impossibilities of conveying thoughts. And yet, I am also a writer. So when people tell me that something I wrote had an emotional impact on them, it means a lot. Thank you. And yes, it was painful.
Besides, though it's an oxymoron, things can be terribly beautiful or touching as well. And those things are what we write poetry about.