"So, when was your last relationship?" Honest you're just a side chick and I'm still debating if you're even hot enough for me to continue seeing you, and that question right there just knocked you down a couple pegs so you're average at best right now.

Water comes in and says, "Would you care for more wine?"

Me, "No thanks sir, oh and can we get separate tickets please? Thanks." I look at the date with the most serious look I can manage and say "Definitely below average now that I think about it."