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RE: Engaged Listening as a Paradigm Shift
This is awesome, and comprehensive. Engaged compassionate listening is something I am always working on. Sometimes I am good at it, sometimes I have my own agenda, and sometimes I lose patience with people. We get what we put in though I guess - so establishing a connection of non judgement before heading into the conversation seems like a no brainer
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Same. Part of my practice is trying to take note of what conditions might be leading to my impatience or my difficulty in setting my agenda aside -- am I hungry or tired? Is there something activating or triggering about the particular way that conversation is going down? Is some important value of mine being dismissed? As I accumulate data about what kinds of external and internal conditions influence my ability to listen, I'm also getting better (I hope!) at noticing what's coming up for me in the moment and being able to make informed decisions about that. Having noticed that I get much more reactive when I'm tired, for example, I've learned to avoid starting conversations about difficult topics late at night, and do so much less frequently than I did when I was much younger. Progress. ;)
Curious to hear if you have any strategies for establishing a connection of non judgement as a way of getting your head in the game, @phillyc?