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RE: Q&A: The Doctor is In (interactive experiment)[updated with answers]
Speaking of standing naked or stripping down to the soul, tell us, (Doctor) @Tarazkp, What is off-limits for you to share but, secretly, you wish you could/would?
Well @yahialababidi,
this is indeed an interesting question and one that I have considered several times. Being the immutable blockchain, find that I do indeed self-censor here but, it isn't for my sake, it is for that of my family. I would like to spend some time writing about my early childhood experiences with more detail but at this point, I do not because it will inevitably lead to revealing details about my brothers, two of which are here. It is not my place to share their lives, it is theirs but of course, our lives are heavily intertwined.
We had an interesting childhood filled with many ups and downs and parents who themselves collected a diverse range of experiences also. My artist father is an Indian Malaysian who moved to Australia in the 60s during 'White Only' policy, my mother was a blue-eyed, blonde, there is a 16 year age gap between youngest and oldest born from the late 60s to the early 80s. The various dynamics created a range of complexities that have fundamentally shaped who I am in the positive and the negative but to reveal my side, is to reveal much of theirs.
Perhaps one day, the stories will surface or at least, an edited version will as I think that writing about some f these things would be cathartic for me, interesting for the readers and perhaps, even useful for some to deal with a range of conflicts from their own past.
There is beauty in the struggle, greatness in the overcoming and triumph to be found in defeat. The stories we hold will all be lost to the winds of time and it is a shame that to protect our egos and save our reputations, most will never be told at all.
Thank you, @Tarazkp for your candid and full reply. I remember reading, with interest, of your father’s remarkable story and noting (on a superficial level) that you/your brother also have blonde wives :)
Protecting the privacy/reputation of family members or loved ones is, of course, noble and understandable. Yet, in their need to understand and heal, writers are often not held back by such considerations.
Which is why having a writer in the family might result in a scandalous, confessional memoir or (as I prefer) one can devise more subtle ruses, in the words of Emily Dickinson, to tell the truth slant.
Dark secrets fester and, in my experience, don’t really help anyone. What’s required, in such cases, is radical honesty and courage, tempered by compassion —three qualities that you amply possess.
Wishing you catharsis & liberation.
I think there are some paintings of my dad's that tell stories of life at various times in my family but, you have to have lived it to see it.
At this point, I am not ready to expose all but it isn't that I haven't processed it myself.
I hear you, timing is key. I struggle myself with what to say & how much. Other times, the truth just tells itself (even if it exits in masquerade...)
Would like to see your dad’s art—if you post it, kindly, alert me so that I don’t miss it.
Thank you for your wonderful response, I'm one of those that live in the awe of your wisdom, writing about what makes you you is what I would love to read no matter how edited it may be. Hahahah
You are just too exceptional, I think this generation is luck enough to have...smile
I'm longing for such day....
Thank you once more.
Ha, good question
Thanks, it's something I ask of myself (as a writer) emboldened by Roman playwright, Terence: