Ulog : #6 Rise from a falldown

Hi to all steemians.
I want to share my life how i rise from a downfall.
We are 5 in the Family, My parent's and my 2 sisters and i'am the youngest.
My parent was too busy at work
And also my two sisters are busy.
In the age of 8 years old i learn how to earn money,
I wake up early in the morning around 0400AM just to prepare my self on my side line 'selling a pandesal'
After 0700AM in the morning i go back in our house just to prepare my self again before going to school.
I need to earn money for my project, and food allowance.
10php is enough everyday.
I continuosly doing that up to age of 12.
Selling different kinds of food.
'Pandesal, Pandecoco, ice drop, ice cream.

Sometimes i went to a jeepney terminal to clean a jeep and pay me with 2php per Jeepney.

In my high school age i was a scholar before and thats why i studied in a private school.

In the age of 16 i began to fall,

I learn how to drink wine, beer, drugs, cigarette,
I'am a victim of'Bullying' i think thats the main reason why i find a companion who will protect me.
After i graduated in high school
My mother decided to stop my schooling because of my vices.
They never ask me if i want to continue studying and what course i want to take.
I begged on my mother to enrol me she gave me 800 php and said ' thats the remaining money i have i already gave all to your sister.
She enroll in a private school taking business Ads.

I accept the money and began to find any school, any course because in my mind i want to continue and finish my schooling even i was a drug dependent.

Before the days end i find a school , and already enroll my self and pass a scholarship program.

The school was so generous to me
They gave me allowance every month worth 2000php.

I continue to fight the effect of shabu in my mind, and body.
i graduated the course i take and easily find a job.

After i graduated and have a job still i was a drug dependent i can't stop it.
I take and sell drugs.

But my mind always think of 'GOD'

January 17, 2001 early in the morning when i wake up my mind and body feel and think.
And asking
'if i stop today will you help me GOD?
If i wont take any drug and throw the shabu i have will you help me to recover?

So i throw a shabu in a trash and deicided my self not to take or taste any shabu.
I tattoo it on my left thigh when i decided to stop and change my life.

It so difficult to fight
If your are a drug dependent your body and mind look for it but i keep on fighting, i keep on saying GOD help me to fight it.

I definetly won on this fight
But i suffered for almost 11 years being Paranoid
From 2001 - 20012 for being paranoid.
I continue to live in a normal life, but being paranoid for 11 years was so difficult.
My Doctor said that it was a discharge process it really takes up to 10 - 11 years of discharge and the effect was being paranoid, depress.

But now 2018 i can say that my mind was fresh as a new born, i think first before i say,
But there was still an effect on my past.

I dont know but i can feel the feelings of my opposite, i can feel if you are happy, sad ,having problem.

My Pastor said that it was a gift of GOD
But for me it was too hard
Because if i look into a person i can feel his feeling, if he was angry i can feel it, if he was happy i can feel it,

But i use this gift to give an advice personally.

Today i'm now a Senior Tech in my field and continue to rise until i reach my dream it almost their. Also i have a complete and happy family.

But way back on My tattoo last January 17, 2001
If you notice the design was look like a #steemit.
And i met steemit this 2018 keep thinking if this was connected..


Thank you #steemit for giving a chance for an ordinary people like me to earn and meet respectful people.