SCHOOL FOR PARENTS: How to raise the self-esteem of the "disabled" child

deisip67 (69)in #steempress • 6 years ago (edited)

An adequate level of self-esteem is the most important component of each person's development. Due to self-esteem, difficulties and obstacles are overcome every day. The problem of self-esteem for children of school age is especially relevant.

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But what to do if a child has a certain disadvantage (delayed mental development, strabismus, epilepsy, short stature, an ugly birthmark or deformation of any part of the body), which almost always forms an inferiority complex and underestimates self-esteem in a boy?

The main thing is the attitude of the parents.

For a child with a defect to grow up sociable and happy, parents should rejoice with the child and be proud of him or her.

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The ability to communicate with other children from an early age is imperative! Young children do not pay attention to external defects, so the child with some disability will not feel "alien" in the society of other children and, in the future, the established pattern of behavior will be transferred naturally to other groups .

If from the beginning the parents are ashamed of the appearance of their child, they do not allow him to communicate with other children, he will feel closed, dissatisfied and will be considered inferior. But if you consider that something insignificant is missing, behave as if it were a normal child, let it go everywhere, like other children, do not worry about the points of view of others or the comments.

As for the curious looks, the fingers and the whispers, the child will still have to get used to them, and the sooner the better. And if the child is constantly at home and only comes out from time to time, he will be particularly sensitive to that manifestation of attention from strangers.

Identify opportunities

A child with developmental problems, if possible, should be close to children like him.

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It will be difficult for parents to maintain the child's self-esteem at the appropriate level if he is the worst student in the class for reasons beyond his control. If it is not possible to organize a child in a specialized institution or in a correctional class, it is necessary to file reasonable demands.

Parents should talk with the classroom teacher, psychologist, and other professionals to determine the child's abilities. Even for a child with a normal stutter, the training plan must be individualized.It is logical that with speech disorders, the student can not count oral material on equal terms with others.

Homework

The self-esteem of the child must begin to be formed within the family, so that later the results of this work (and this is exactly the job) not affect the child's behavior when they interact with their peers. Phrases like "What am I going to do with you? All children are like children, and you are my punishment", they must be excluded once and for all.

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You can not compare your child with other children. Any success should be encouraged. However, it is impossible to "humiliate" a child. Requirements for the implementation of tasks, physical exercises must correspond to their condition. If the parents justify the failures even in those cases in which the child could succeed, a feeling of self-pity will form in him. This will not increase self-esteem.

Parents can create a list of chores, where the child can demonstrate their positive qualities and abilities. Sections In circles, any extracurricular activity that is interesting to the child will also help him to do so. The main thing is that he understands that, in some way, he can also be the best.

Help to gain authority

For a child of any age, the attitudes of classmates are important. Parents have the opportunity to help the child gain credibility. For children, ordinary things play an important role: clothes, toys.

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If the family has the material capabilities, a fashionable outfit or a new doll can help "become yours", but here it is very important not to exaggerate and not to show off. It is important that the child does not have the most expensive doll, but a doll that will not be worse than the others.

Well, what to do if it is not possible to buy fashionable clothes and the most modern devices for your child? Show the fantasy!

Another way to become your own company, which does not require large material costs: the organization of vacations. Try a program with your child, contests that your friends like. This will help parents to observe the relationship that develops between the child and his friends. Then it becomes clearer with what problems you need to work on.

Often, good relationships with peers do not work at all, not because the child has an ugly mole or a bad pronunciation of the consonants, but because of the nature of their character. Rudeness, arrogance and other negative qualities can be corrected.

To motivate

The child must also know what to respond to his peers, if they make fun of his deficiencies. He must be able to perceive ridicule correctly, not take it seriously or insist on it. Determine the baby's strengths and qualities and constantly remind her about them.

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Count as often as possible the historical figures for whom diseases have not become an obstacle. For example, about Stephen Hawking, a well-known physicist who is not allowed to walk or talk with a disease.

In the modern world there is a place for everyone. People with mental and physical disabilities find work, are made in creativity and sports. Often, the thought stimulates them: "Nature has given me less than the rest, but I can do more!"

That is why parents should think quickly about the formation of correct self-esteem in a child. And then, the chances of a determined and talented person coming out of it increase many times.