Steemwars :: Underlord Negavader's Series of Bad Decisions
This is me, Underlord Negavader. Yes, it's a selfie. I had to attach my Ultradark Soulcatcher 4000 selfiecam to a stick at the end of my spear to get the proper angle. Thank goodness for duct tape.
Intangible
Perfector Class War Vessel
Serial Number BYOB-9021-O
Stardate 180520.8
Location: In the cargo hold
...priority message...
I’m huddled in the cargo hold, intercepting messages sent on the space comm by my boss. I’m inserting my own into the feed right now as a warning to any that might receive it.
I don’t know if this message will reach anyone, but I have no options left.
I’ve made a bad decision. A very bad decision.
I’ve joined a cause I no longer believe in. Truth be told, I don’t mind the cause. It’s the person I’m following that makes my space undies bunch up. My boss.
Future Galacdictator Tangle.
Galacdorktater is more like it.
If you’ve heard her call for minions to assist on her mission to take over the universe or some such nonsense, I suggest you find a better use for your time. Flip burgers. Knit a sweater. Eat a pierogie.
For me, it’s already too late. I’m on board her ship bound for some unknown destination. I can’t back out now. I signed some very important-looking documents attesting to my willingness to be her minion.
It’s too late for me, but you can avoid my fate.
My only hope is that I might be able to usurp her power in some way. To steer her off the path that might put her in power, and thus leave me forever a minion. But I have to be surreptitious. I can’t blatantly go against what I agreed to in my contract.
I do still want to get paid, after all.
I am Underlord Negavader. I would very much like to be Overlord Negavader. Because Underlord sounds too much like a brand of manly undergarments.
Kind of claustrophobic in this helmet, and I can't see crap, but my breathing sounds awesome.
heavy breathing ensues
...end priority message...
WOULD YOU LIKE TO KNOW MORE?
STEEM Wars is the brainchild of @gmuxx. It is a community creativity parody project with a sci-fi basis. Read more in the following links:
The above blurb is unabashedly stolen from my fearless leader @tanglebranch's original post. She's so busy preening she's not likely to notice. Her other minion, Sixty-Wine, (@caleblailmusik) is likely busy helping her put on her fancy lingerie.
Images from Wikia
Join us at The Writers Block on Discord.
A great community of writers there, helping each other get better at what they enjoy doing.
Ha ha! Whaaaat? You don’t want to be likened to manly undergarments? Sounds like Galactictator Tangle is going to have her hands full with you on board!
More likely than not she'll have her hands full of sheep, wine, and perogies.
--Underlord Negavader
You hoped and it has realised. Gave me a good chuckle. Underwear--I mean Underlord Negavader. May the Steem be with you! From what you're saying of Future Galacdictator Tangle, you're going to need it.
I fear she may be reading my messages even now. I must ... be polite....and respectful....
HER BREATH SMELLS LIKE PIEROGIES!
There. I said it. I feel better now.
Wait, I think I know your boss. Does she happen to have 4 faces, kind of swoopy-looking, thinks she's the lord of the Underverse? I know the type, anyway. Good luck.
I think you're thinking of someone else. Someone cool and awesome.
Duct tape has saved the day once more!
It may someday save more than the day. It may eventually need to save the whole universe. Assuming I can tape Galacdictator @tanglebranch to the wall or something.
--Underlord Negavader
Haha ... even in space duct tape is a high-tech. Very funny, Negativer. The light side of the force awaits your return:)
In space, pencils and duct-tape are essentially foolproof. Perhaps I can use these tools to facilitate my successful return...and rise to power...
The pen is mightier than the sword but I think the pencil gets erased ... tread carefully negativator:)
OK... That's one spaceship I'm not going to hitch a ride on.
You and me both.
wait. no. It's too late for me. :(
Send halp.
It's just me and the Woolfkie. I have no help. I could send in the mutt. He's had my back in a few tight spots on hostile planets. But he does fart... a lot...
Dangit! What's the good in being a Tall Space Witch if the best you can do to help is to send in your lintball tumbleweed fluffkin for support?
I guess I'm on my own.
Well, your ship is outside cursing range at the moment. If you can arrange for our shops to cross paths, maybe we can negotiate a deal. If the price is right...
lol! Just reading this now. Oh, the giggles that are going to come out of this series. ;)
The height of fiction this will not be, but if we can generate some lols I'm fine with it. :)
Happy weekend