OVER THE SILVER SKY TO THE WORLD OF NEVER : Part 126 - The Seagull Massacre.

I've recently encountered the concept of the "REALITY CHECK" so now I'm going to examine the fuck out of this concept. I've just checked reality. I assure you it's functioning perfectly and 100% real. That means reality is working. That's only my reality though. You should check your own reality. If it's not functioning properly turn it off then on again. If it's still not working, call tech support. In case you're confused, reality is that stuff out there that is real. There are no unicorns and your parents never loved you. You were just a convenient tax break they took advantage of and a supply of valuable compatible organs. The stuff inside your head is not reality. It's made up of things called memories you see. Memory is fucking awful. It rarely works properly. As you'd know if you ever tore your home apart to find those keys. Only to discover they are somewhere you don't even remember going. Usually under a pile of shit nobody placed there. The reality is that you forgot. You were thinking of other things. You carelessly placed your keys down and then you or someone else put those magazines on top of them. The reality inside your head is not real reality. It's what your brain makes up as an excuse for you being a complete fuck up. Some cunts will tell you there is no such thing as truth or reality. Don't believe them, they are cunts. Reality and truth will fuck you up if you don't recognize them. Reality will kill you without giving a shit. Hence those peace loving liberal backpackers travelling to far off countries to prove that mankind is wonderful and peaceful. Hence the numerous news stories of them being kidnapped, raped and murdered by wonderful peaceful mankind. If you've got a friend who is a liberal, peace loving, backpacking cunt planning to travel to a far off country to spread some love, tell them to save the airfare. There are plenty of neighborhoods here where people will kill you in your own language. People will be spared the expense of flying back whatever remains of your dead body. REALITY CHECKED.

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"Don't hurt them." Poppy protested. "I think they want to show me something. Let's see what it is first."
"Sounds like a plan." Fetu responded.
Jake wasn't sure whether that was critical of him or not. It could be taken either way. His own plan to drag Poppy from their grasp and fight their way back to the boat, had a few flaws admittedly.
"Okay, but at the first sign of trouble I'm resorting to my plan... Or any superior plan that comes along."
The plant people herded Poppy towards a cleft in their mound. It opened up before her.
"See, they're intelligent. They made this mound and constructed this door. It must use counterweights. Unless they've found another work round. That would be interesting to investigate." As she walked through Poppy stopped dead. "Oh no. Look."
Fetu and Jake waded through the crowd to reach her. Both of them having to edge through sideways. It turned out that the hill was hollow. The middle was open to the sky. It looked beautiful. Dozens of different plants. It looked horrific. Half a dozen birds were fighting over the remains of the creatures dead. Poppy gave him a forlorn look.
"Are we sure they are dead ones though? It could be how they reproduce couldn't it. They plant the bodies in the ground and a new plant person grows."
"That would be just as bad." The nerd objected forcefully. "These damn birds are predating them. They probably didn't have any predators wherever they came from. They'll be wiped out by an invasive species."
"Strictly speaking the plant people are the invasive species here."
Oh my God Poppy gave him a glare, every bit as eviscerating as Scarlet could manage.
"They've got no defense. These creatures are sentient and intelligent. Give me your pistol."
He'd handed it over before he knew what he was doing. Taking cover might be a good idea.
"Now go easy with that..." The gun barked. A gull dropped to the ground with a hole where its body had once been. "Good shot."
She marched back to him, handed over the discharged weapon and took another.
"Now let's kill all of them."
Holy shit. She'd turned into a seagull psychopath. One he'd trained. Those shooting lessons had taken hold. No wait. She only winged the next one. The others took off. Only to perch themselves on the rim of the top of this structure. The pistol was handed back. The eyes of a cold blooded bird murderer bored into his.
"Is she scaring you Fetu, because she's scaring me?"
The Polynesian chuckled.
"Now. I want you to clear the entire island of every bird. Not one of them should be left alive."
He was about to point out the one flapping around on the ground, but then Poppy stamped on it a few times.
"Before I set off bent on avian genocide, can I just point out the circle of life. Things eat other things."
She was still kicking that bird.
"They haven't evolved to fight. They don't kill or eat anything." It was as though she were talking about her own people. Poppy had adopted them.
Fetu drew his large ax. Hefting it in his hands.
"I'll come with ya, if you like. Lend you a hand."
Jake looked at the ax, then at the birds, then back at the ax.
"What are you going to do. Wave it at them?" There was an ear splitting roar and one of the gulls perched on the rim of the mound exploded into blood and feathers. The end of Fetu's ax was smoking. "I take it back. That's a handy tool to have."
"Means I gotta carry less. That way I'm not loaded down. I can carry more."
"Like a spare ax." Jake suggested.
"Precisely."
His attention moved back to the nerd, who was in danger of hyperventilating.
"While we're doing that, what will you be doing?"
"I'll be teaching them how to kill seagulls and any other bird that turns up. Evening out the odds. There'll be plenty more where those bastards came from."
"Something about this strikes me as being wrong. You know. Such as the whole concept of introducing violence to vegetarian pacifists. On the other hand, I fucking hate seagulls."

For the next hour or so Jake and Fetu wandered the island dealing out death to anything with wings. There weren't a large number of victims by any means. Only a couple of dozen all told. It was also really handy that the white feathers stood out so much from the background. Having completed their task they both swept the area once again. Knowing that the odds were more would show up. The balance of nature thing still disturbed Jake marginally. He was no scientist. Poppy was. One who he'd keep a closer eye on from now on. Both to prevent kidnapping and her inventing a doomsday device to hold the world to ransom. The men headed back to the mound to see what the female nerd had been up to. Quite a lot as it turned out.

"Jesus Christ that's a crossbow. How the hell did you make that?" Jake gasped.
There was no wood on the island, but there was most of a functioning projectile weapon. Several times the size of its operators. Sort of like plant artillery.

"I drew it. They grew it. It's absolutely fascinating. There aren't many things they can't produce. That's conjecture based on little evidence, but I'm pretty sure I'm right. The speed of the growth is phenomenal. It took less than half an hour to make all the bits. I'm going to have to modify a few things to fit with their physiology. Once I do I'm confident they can replicate my work accurately."
"The start of a little arms race no doubt." Jake mused. "We really ought to be getting back to the ship. It can't have escaped their notice that we've been shooting birds. I'm surprised someone hasn't come to check. Oh wait. I said you might be doing some target practice. In a way you did. You're a cold blooded killer Poppy. Congratulations."
"I'm staying here." She insisted.
"That's not going to happen I'm afraid. I'm afraid that if I turn up at the ship without you, the Captain will be wearing my balls as earrings. You're coming back Poppy. If it's a choice between them and me, I'm sticking with me."
"We could always let the ship know we'll be stopping over." Fetu interjected. "There's bed rolls and a tent in the boat. Might be nice."
Having already made a fool of himself, more than once, Jake decided to ask rather than conjecture for comic effect.
"How would you let the ship know?"
"Signal flags in the boat. I send up a flare then use em to let them know we'll be staying over."
That could be bad. It could be worse than bad.
"You aren't going to go into details are you?"
"It's signal flags. They ain't really that good for sticking in lots of detail. I'll just say we found something interesting and will be stopping the night. They might ask why, I doubt it though. They trust me."
That was a bit barbed. Entirely justified, but barbed. The decision had been taken out of Jake's hands. It having never been in them in the first place. To her credit, Poppy didn't crow over her win. She accepted it as the right thing to do.

With the 3 humans helping, things went faster. The plant beings had been taught how to make a net. Jake and Fetu climbed the mound to place it over the top. The mesh was fine enough that the majority of birds would be unable to enter. Once it was in place it became very sticky. Adhesive in effect. Anything that landed on that net wouldn't be taking off again. It would die there then decompose into some really good fertilizer. It seemed that Poppy didn't fuck about. During one of his numerous carrying tasks, Jake had a thought. When they eventually reached the land of the Simbri, an sentient avian intelligence, it might be best not to mention this. It could lead to a plant versus bird war or worse.

Jake felt a tapping at his leg after climbing down. The one he'd saved was looking up at him. It had company. The two tiny things wanted him to follow them he thought. They led him back into that garden in the center of the building. To a small grave. The feeling of sadness that overwhelmed him was so intense he could smell it. Actually he could. The plant people were giving off a scent. One that contained emotions. The perfume changed from that to melancholy to endless summer sunshine. Either they believed in life after death or a bright new future. He couldn't say which. When night fell the creatures brought out yellow light globes. Hundreds of them. They were beautiful. Their brightness far more intense than anything else he'd seen. No glare though. They could do with those on board the ship. Lighting was from lamps. Granted you could turn them on with the push of a lever, but they were poor in comparison to these small globes of fire.

The three of them slept in the tent and finished up in the morning. Two crossbows had been constructed. There were nets in strategic positions. Also plenty of pointy things to fire at anything that represented a danger. Rather disturbingly, before they left, Poppy appeared to be giving them lessons on how to make explosive plant based projectile weapons. He knew there were plants that released their seeds like that. The diagrams Poppy had drawn definitely looked like vegetable guns. Surely nothing could go wrong with introducing these innovations. Hopefully there weren't other plant creatures on the smaller islands for these to conquer. It was time to head back. Unless Poppy thought otherwise.

"Shame you didn't get a chance to collect all those samples." Jake commented.
"I did. My little helpers collected them for me. Far more than I could have collected." Poppy contradicted.
"Super duper, lets be off then."
"Um.. There is one tiny thing. I'd like to take these two with us." She gestured towards the couple that had shown him the tiny grave. "Before you object it would take years to study them on this island. Back on the ship I can use real technology."
"What do they eat?"
"Sunshine and a few nutrients I can either gather or manufacture."
"I'm not sure. Fetu's in charge let him decide." Jake deferred.
"No I'm not." The Polynesian answered.
"Yes you are. You're the ranking officer."
"On the ship I am. On land I'm just me. This isn't an away mission so there's no hierarchy."
"I thought you were the one in charge." Jake insisted. "It made me feel quite at ease knowing you were. Now I find out you weren't. Nobody was in charge. Unless I was in charge of Poppy. No, what am I thinking. I wasn't in charge of Poppy, I was her porter. What do you think about taking these two new passengers back to the ship?"
Poppy gave Fetu a pleading look. He shrugged.
"Could be a laugh. Don't see what harm they would do."
She hugged him. All he'd done was not raise an objection. He hadn't enthused about taking the plants on board. Fetu wasn't particularly bothered.
"Come on then. Let's introduce them to the Captain. With any luck they'll distract her."

Damn those bags were a lot heavier the second time around. Jake was bent double under the weight. Fetu took the heaviest one and slung it over his shoulder like a bag of feathers. They rowed back to the ship. Scarlet was waiting for them. Her eyebrow raised and her head tilted to one side she stood there as Jake got on deck.

"Halliday, are you trying to avoid me?"
"No." He replied mystified. "There were complications I'm afraid. Samples and things. We've got a lot of samples." This was simply delaying the inevitable. "Look. I screwed up. Took my eye off the ball. More accurately I took my eyes off Poppy. There are these tiny plant people you see. They kind of kidnapped her. Only they didn't. They live in that hill. They built it I think. They were being wiped out by seagulls... Are you believing any of this?"
"Do go on." She answered levelly.
"We wiped out the gulls, while Poppy showed them how to defend themselves against the threat. She also brought a couple of them along. I said it would be alright."
At this juncture Poppy exhibited her her two new friends. Scarlet appeared to be examining them dispassionately.
"Well done Sparky. I thought there was something up with that island. I knew If I sent you ashore you'd accidentally stumble across whatever it was. You did good. So did you Poppy. One last thing. Would you mind coming with me back to the island. I've got to see these cute little tykes in their natural environment." Poppy nodded. "Great let's go."