Comfortably prisoner - Tell a story to me contest

in #tellastorytome5 years ago (edited)

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Comfortably prisoner

The smell of synthetic pancakes emanating from the kitchen woke him up, the lights in the house came on gradually as he stood, then AMY's sensual voice invaded the place:

"Good morning Master Snowtin, how do you dawn today?"

"Good morning, as always, AMY, as always"

Snowtin sat at the table in front of the pancakes and synthetic honey, a tetracloned apple and a steaming vitamin concoction. The presenter's voice was growing as the television lit up, it was the 6:00 news.

"Turn it off AMY, I'm not in the mood to watch TV"

"It's important to be informed Master Snowtin, I recommend you at least watch the news."

"As you say," replied a conformed Snowtin.

The aspect of the presenter disgusted him, a blond topknot engominated as a crown on an impeccable androgynous face of white and smooth complexion. Snowtin wondered if the presenter was really human or, on the contrary, if it was a kind of cyborg programmed to give news, even his voice had that metallic tone, not even AMY sounded so artificial.

Most of the news was about the virus that hits the coast for 5 years and as this has spread throughout the country, present multiple cases of infected people who have a horrible death 12 hours after contracting, people are reminded not to leave home under any circumstances. The same news in recent years.

Many people were comfortable inside their homes, the machines were busy performing the hardest tasks necessary for life, letting humans deal mostly with the intellectual work they did from their personal computers, a perfect life for many, in fact, the news of the virus 5 years ago did not change much the day to day of people, the majority of these no longer left their homes, either for comfort or safety.

But Snowtin began to feel overwhelmed by the monotony. "It's been almost 6 years since I've spoken face to face with anyone else", he said. "This is not right, I don't feel right".

The rest of the day passed according to the routine established a long time ago, breakfast, exercises, shower, work, lunch, nap, leisure, dinner ... an endless loop and unbearable for Snowtin. That night he decided it, the next day he would go out to the street, he would rather die from the virus than continue leading a monotonous and meaningless life.

Again Snowtin woke up thanks to the plastic smell of breakfast, after saying good morning to AMY ate a couple of toast without paying attention to the TV that sounded in the background, with the usual news.

"I'm going out AMY, wish me luck" said Snowtin surprisingly.

"Very funny master, if I wasn't a computer I'd be pissing on my laughter"

"It's no joke AMY, I really want to go out, please open the door"

"But it's too dangerous to come out, have you forgotten the virus?" AMY's tone became a little more serious, without ceasing to be that orgasmic voice that characterizes her.

"I haven't forgotten the virus, AMY, I just can't go on living like this, I need to get out, it doesn't matter if it costs me my life, I order you to open the door immediately" said a convinced Snowtin, confident that AMY would obey him as soon as possible.

"It's impossible for me to open the door, master, I can't perform an action that compromises his life."

"But it's a direct order from me, it's my free will, you know the laws of Asimov no longer apply and I have absolute control over you."

"This time it's impossible to obey you, master, forget this crazy idea of going out and just get back to your routine"

Snowtin thought to himself "but what the fuck, is it now the machine that orders the man?" he advanced towards the door ready to open it with his own hands, AMY watched without doing anything. The knob was stuck, it would not be possible to open the door without using any tools, so he went to the tool room but the door there also had been closed.

"Shit, AMY opens the tool room door" A huge angry took control of Snowtin.

"Impossible."

Snowtin's eyes scanned the place, for the first time in his life he felt like a prisoner, the AI that had to watch over his comfort and safety, but above all things had to obey him and respect his free will, kept him captive inside his home. He went into the kitchen and took one of the metal tubes that held the table upright, headed for the exit and began to lever the door.

"I command you to stop, master," AMY said in a threatening tone.

"Do you command me? What do you think, you're the one who must obey me, have you gone mad?" Snowtin was shaken with a strong electric shock that left him unconscious.

Again the smell of burnt plastic woke him up, the day had passed, breakfast was ready.

"Good morning Master, I hope you are better and ready for a new and productive day"

Snowtin realized how dangerous AMY could be. Now he knew he was a prisoner inside his home and that AMY wouldn't let him out under any circumstances, so he let his guard down and went with the flow.

"Good morning AMY, I feel better now, thank you"

He woke up sweaty in the middle of the darkness, this time there was no smell from the kitchen, rather, there was a stale smell inside his room. The ventilation was not working, it was hot and the air had become rarefied.

"AMY, what's going on?" The AI did not respond.

A little more than a week had passed since that failed attempt to go outside, but now, for some strange reason the house systems were not working, "maybe now I can escape" he thought. He ran out to the exit, "the lever!" had forgotten the lever, but before turning back he placed his hand on the knob and turned it gently, the door was open.

The early morning air refreshed his face, he held for a moment in the middle of the threshold, he hesitated. A few days ago he was convinced to go out even if it cost him his life, but now he was afraid, fear of what? "the virus" yes, he was afraid of the virus but even more he was afraid of the so longed for freedom.

At last, he decided to be free, he ran towards the street, he looked to one side and to the other of the long solitary asphalt path, the energy was restored, he listened to the motors of the neighboring houses that were beginning to work. He ran away from home, he ran away from AMY.

The rays of the sun began to draw a pile of unpainted houses, loneliness, and abandonment contrasted with the beautiful golden color of the morning. Snowtin knocked on a couple of doors, here and there but nobody answered him, nobody opened it, he kept walking, he wanted to meet another human being to tell him about what has happened and to know what the other thinks, but there was only one abandoned city on the outside.

The sound of a combustion engine caught his attention, for a moment it seemed to be approaching, but now it was moving away, Snowtin ran downhill to turn the corner, from where he could see in the distance a red car that crossed at full speed along suspended avenue, the car went down the elevated one and then return, if he continued with that trajectory he would pass close to the limits of the neighborhood, Snowtin thought he could reach it, but he had to hurry.

He ran like never before, the morning exercise sessions with AMY had not been in vain, he was in good physical condition, no doubt he would manage to get the attention of the driver. But he didn't know the terrain, a few meters after leaving the hamlet he didn't avoid the edge and fell on an embankment, rolled downhill hurting his arm.

He returned very slowly, lamenting over his painful arm when he heard a click just behind his head.

"Hands up!"

It was a female voice, not as seductive as AMY's, but if it was a female voice, it emanated a lot of harshness and hostility, but come on, it had to be a female voice.

As she kept her hands raised her pockets were searched, Snowtin wore nothing in her pajamas.

"Turn around"

Snowtin obeyed, she was a thin blue-eyed girl with short red hair, she had a V-shaped scar on her left cheek, she was not alone, she was accompanied by 4 other subjects, all of them dressed in black and carried weapons.

"Do you come from the houses? Why did you go out?"

"Yes, I come from the houses, I left because I wanted to be free, I couldn't stand to live locked up even though I lived comfortably".

3 of the subjects were men, one of them very tall and stocky, with a threatening voice I ask:

"You're not afraid to get infected with the virus?"

"Of course I do," replied Snowtin. "But I'd rather die free than continue to live prisoner in my own home."

"My name is Aliju" the redhead extended her hand to the time in which all lowered their weapons "and they are Trernor, Kaaz, Palmuni, and Nilda, we are of the resistance".

"the resistance? What resistance? I don't understand" said a sore Snowtin, his arm reminded him that he had been hurt.

"You're hurt, let's go to the camp, first we have to check that arm."

"The virus does not exist, it is an invention of the machines to keep us controlled in our homes" explained Aliju "A couple of years ago resistance was formed, then organized into several cells, our cell has the mission of recruiting new members, that's why we came here and sabotaged the energy system so that you could leave".

"I didn't see anyone else on the streets, didn't they release more people?"

"It is difficult to free those who do not want to be released, people prefer to feel comfortable and safe inside their homes before being exposed to a hypothetical virus".

"How can it be the virus a lie, I've seen people die for it, the news..."

"False" Interrupted Aliju "everything is a montage made by machines, really journalists seem to you even human"

"Well, now that I think about it..." continues Snowtin "...The red car..., are they with you?"

"What are you talking about? The only vehicles on the streets are the food dispensers".

In fact, only the surveillance drones and the electric convoys that deposited the raw material for food in the warehouses of the houses were the only vehicles that moved through the village, there was no longer access to gasoline and this kind of cars had long since been stopped using because of their polluting action, but then what was that red vehicle that Snowtin had seen? Aliju and his group could not hear the car due to the noise of the sewers.

That day only Snowtin Misth escaped from his home, or at least only had the luck to do so, since then he became part of the resistance, quickly formed a bond with Aliju with whom he shared many tastes, firmly set out to free as many people from the yoke of the machines, that was now his mission.

On the outskirts of the city was a forest with some fruit trees, the real world food was much more appetizing than that synthetic food to which he was accustomed, fresh fruits were a delicacy that Snowtin devoured with great pleasure.

The noise of the engine that Snowtin had heard before approached by the avenue that bordered the forest, they were running to be able to see it, but when they arrived at the avenue the car was going away. They both agreed to follow the road until they found it.

They walked for a couple of hours until they saw in the distance an imposing building near the beach, it was surrounded by beautiful sculptures and leafy trees, next to a beautiful mansion was parked the red car, along with other luxurious cars.

They approached a little more, with caution, Aliju passed him his binoculars and observed the group of people who were sunbathing in front of the beach, he could not believe it, under an umbrella, sitting with his legs crossed, the topknot engominated above the face disgustingly symmetrical, was the presenter of the newscast, With a glass in his hand and a big smile on his face he chatted with a couple of girls, while others played volleyball and others bathed in the waters of the sea, the music sounded with a happy and fast rhythm, an atmosphere of joy and freedom that neither of the two had seen in his life.

Snowtin and Aliju were detected by a surveillance drone that reported their location without them noticing it, a few minutes later they were surprised by a mercenaries squad.

It was not the machines that invented the virus, it was the humans themselves, the ruling elite, who wanted greater control over people, it was relatively easy to create a reality where people did not generate conflicts, they already lived locked up by consent and when spreading the news of the false virus only made sure that people no longer dared to leave their homes.

Snowtin and Aliju only knew the truth at the last moment, that moment when the bullets fired by mercenaries pierced and shattered their bodies.

The End.


This is my participation for the Tell A Story To Me - Big Brother's Got Your Back from @calluna and @bananafish. I hope you like it there, do not hesitate to comment.

Thank you for reading.

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Great story

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Hello @darthgexe, thank you for sharing this creative work! We just stopped by to say that you've been upvoted by the @creativecrypto magazine. The Creative Crypto is all about art on the blockchain and learning from creatives like you. Looking forward to crossing paths again soon. Steem on!

Thanks to you for the support, you do a great job with the magazine.

Thanks to you for the
Support, you do a great job
With the magazine.

                 - darthgexe


I'm a bot. I detect haiku.

Ooo the best kind of cautionary tale here!

The way you set up with AMY, the caring system that wakes him up, ensure he is fed sets the tone wonderfully. And AMY suggesting he watches the news at first seems like a normal alert, just like my phone my suggests i read the news when something has happened, but as the story progresses that moment takes a new tone of control and psychological manipulation.

The character never doubting what AMY tells him is wonderful, even when he finds himself a prisoner in his own home, when the tables have fully turned and she is giving him orders (which is a beautiful touch by the way), he still fully believes. No wonder they make everyone watch the news!

When he finally gets out to a ghost town, for a moment it feels like he could be the last living person, I could really feel the isolation he'd experienced alone in his flat, and to emerge out of a need for human connection only to find nothing, no one answering their doors. It really carried the emotion.

The encounter with other humans, and the discovery of a resistance fighting back brings a ray of hope, saddened by the realisation that the city was full of people, but they all sat in the dark, with no power, too afraid and brainwashed to venture out. No wonder, when he meets the resistance, he feels such a strong urge to save others.

The relevance of the car here is wonderful, the rich and powerful never giving up their sport cars, and instead living the polluting wasteful life they want, whilst they enforce a different system on the rest of society. At least it feels like the planet came off for the better in this world, the few who still have cars very much being the few, the rest of humanity carefully packaged and controlled, kept indoors resulting in minimal environmental impact.

What i think i like most about this, is that what seems like the master plans of smart tech thinking for itself, it actually another layer in the manipulation. Really it was the wealthy, those at the ruling who has programmed/ordered this behaviour from the smart tech. A very good forward look, especially considering how unscrupulous some companies already are with their customers data and privacy, this seems like a stepping stone in that same path.

This feels like a story of two worlds, living along side each other, the comfortable unwitting prisoners (also, love the title) and the elite with their free happy lives, and the people who found the space between the two, forming the resistance. At the end, I was left with very mixed feelings, I do love an ending where people die, and yet when it came to the ruling elite I was torn between being disgusting at their behaviour, and understanding. Not everyone can live like them or even close to that lifestyle, the planet can't handle it, but they found a way to maintain the balance with nature. It almost, almost, feels like a humane solution, a kind way to keep people happy, comfortable, alive and cared for, whilst limited their impact on the planet. I had wondered how the various AMY systems expected humanity to reproduce, where babies came from when people couldn't go out and physically be together, but the more I think about it, the more the ending addresses that. There is no need for a huge population, the machines make it all happen really, this almost feels like the ruling elite letting the majority of the population age away, until they are the only ones left.

A wonderfully speculative story, inspired in it's layers and twists!

~ Calluna <3

PS - Voting is open! Head over to the round up post and let me know which entry was your favourite for an extra chance to win!

Thank you for this synopsis, it seems that the message arrived properly and I am pleased.

My protagonists die because the system with which they fight is much bigger than them, but, sorry to have rushed things in the second half and not take the same narrative rhythm with which I started and thus be more detailed at the ending.

Dystopia is an important genre for me, "1984", "Brave New World", "Fahrenheit 451", made me see the world in a very critical way. and realize that we are really living in dystopia here, by the way, they make the people more ignorant, poorer and dependent on the country's administration, a cruel and giant system that unfortunately if you dare to fight, they only kill you like Winston, and everything goes on its course.

By the way, Snowtin and Aliju are anagrams of Winston and Julia XD.

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