ULOG #1: Random Thoughts and Realizations

_Source

Sometimes we are faced with situations where we know we need to make a decision. And sometimes there are only two ways to go: either here or there. And sometimes you know that you really have to be "there", but you're too afraid to even try leaving.

So now I am here. I am frustrated and unhappy, but it gives me security. Security that no matter what happens, I wouldn't go astray, maybe crazy, but never without a penny.

And here's "there". The place where I have been into, but took for granted, and the place where I wanna go back to. But do I still have what it takes to be "there"? Did I really waste too much time to be stuck "here"?

Everyone's moving forward. But me, I took steps backwards. I am gaining my strength to get out from "here" and just be out "there", but everyday it seems like the little strength that's left of me is slowly fading away.

Don't get me wrong, being "here" is okay. In fact, most of the people around me are saying that it's better to be "here", to be safe, to be secure. But like a boat that is safe on the shores, it's not meant to be there, but rather to sail at sea, despite the risks. That's how I feel about me.

To be free, to be happy, to be with someone I love dearly, these are the simple things I long to be.

To live life at its fullest, and doing what I love most, are so precious to me.

Should I settle despite the unhappiness I'm feeling or should I break free and risk not just me but probably the lives of the people around me?

Here or there? Maybe I'll just let destiny decide for me.