Should I Break the Deal? I'm Just Not Good at Breaking Things

This feels like a deal breaker sort of night. Should I break my deal? I don’t like breaking things—I’m a very gentle person.

Big Dog agrees. He was begging me for food, staring at me with his sad gold eyes as I sat here with a piece of toast. I offered it to him. I had an image of his big nostrils sucking the strawberry jam up into their caverns before suddenly putting on the breaks. Strawberry jam is a deal breaker, was written on his face.

Having to tolerate a puffball chicken during nap time? Deal breaker.

But he is a dog, what does he really know about breaking things? I’m so tired, why am I debating this? I could break this deal and spend the rest of the night eating snacks and wasting time. But…I’m a very indecisive person.

I shivered when I went outside to close up the chickens this evening. The naked branches of the Chinese elm hanging over the coop were bursting forth a bright green new wardrobe. It had been warm all throughout February. Now suddenly it is cold. Winter had agreed to hit the road in its deal with spring, but…tonight is the deal breaker.

The chickens didn’t lay a single egg. The cold weather was their deal breaker. Now those are some creatures that know how to be decisive. One second they are peaceful, the next they are trying to peck your toenail off. Those creatures know how to break things too. They’d recommend a deal breaking for sure.

The children are nestled all snug in their beds, while visions of leftover birthday cake danced in their heads. “If you don’t eat your green beans, you don’t get any cake,” I said at dinner time. There were phases to this green bean process.

Cute little green bean hating hands.

The boy spent approximately ten minutes investigating the small pile of green beans on his plate. First, he eyeballed the green beans and their companions, the mushrooms, carefully. Next, he picked one up and rubbed it between his fingers for a proper tactile examination. Lastly, he took a tentative bite, smaller than a mouse nibble. His face contorted in a dramatic expression of disgust. Unfortunately, green beans in a balsamic vinegar sauce are a deal breaker.

The boy definitely knows how to break things, including deals. I respect that. Not enough to give him cake, but I respect it.

My husband came home after working several long shifts the last few days, and went straight to bed. He felt the deal breaking nature of tonight too—a lack of sleep is always a deal breaker.

A drawbridge...broken.

I’m breaking this deal. You can’t get blood from a stone; you can’t get words from a blank mind. Even Big Dog broke a deal tonight with that strawberry toast, and that dog is a garbage disposal. Clearly it is meant to be.

I am not writing tonight. Not at all. I am going to eat some snacks and sip some hot cocoa and listen to the dogs snore, and bask in my complete lack of effort. Decision made: Deal is Broken.

Wait a second…what are all these words doing here?

I’ve decided to write (or try to with my very limited free time) on this blog every day, as of March 1st until March 10th, in honor of my one year posting anniversary. Tonight I almost broke the deal, but so far, so good. We shall see what tomorrow brings.