Confused Writer

in #writing6 years ago (edited)

Dear reader,

The voices in my head push me towards unexperienced pens as I scrawl my unsifted thoughts. Some are a few sentences long while others fill up pages. Raw and uncensored emotions painted in hurried words across paper and screens vulnerable to diverse opinions.

They sit in writing apps and remain in hidden journals away from the public eye as I weigh on the creeping doubts about my wording and if I should post them.

Sometimes, I type indecisively on my keyboard as a finger hangs over the delete button just in case something negative in me disagrees with what I am posting. I wonder if all struggling writers do that.

In my depths I somehow know I was birthed to scribe but I can't seem to work out my befitting path in such a crowded craft. Ideas keep budding and dying as procrastination (read time limitation) eats away relentless dreams behind the closed curtains.

Creation never ceases, turning my mind into a vast of decaying stanzas and powerful pieces from inspiring journeys. Stories that deserve to be told boldly disturbingly replaced by new memories before they are told.

I want to pen endless life lessons and experiences. Moving tales of amazing individuals whose dreams have changed lives. Some wondrous rarely spoken of heroes responsible for keeping humanity balance in a lacking society.

In a world buried in so much pain; I'll bleed with those bleeding, encourage the ones giving up as I chant with the ones who're finding their voices while fighting for the voiceless. I am still looking for where I belong in writing.

Poetry calls at any time and so does the idea to start writing letters to struggling souls. I would absorb their pain so I can manage call mine out and finally face my elusive past. If only I can perfect my flow and synchronize my words with their feels or mine.

To spice it up, seductive pens keep distracting me from deep writes from time to time. This translates to interesting feedback mostly negative. My archives tell a tale on how to avoid unnecessary judgments.

I yearn to fully understand my pens or be able to compress them in one personality. A persona that can allow a storyteller, a poet, and a feminist blended with an erotica writer, thrive in one entity.

I look forward to telling my truth and help amplify other people's truth in the process.

As my unexplored connection with words insists on taking charge, I am only seeking to quite my chaotic mind. I also plan on spreading love and positive vibes. Let's heal :)

Signed.

Confused Writer.


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Appreciated ❤️

I think you're doing a marvelous job already. The only thing we can do as writers is to continue to write. As you have said, you are born to be a scribe. Embrace that and walk forward with a smile. Stand tall and look people in the eyes and realize that you have a story that is unique to you and that other people who read your story will benefit and grow from your experiences. Be well, my friend.

Many thanks from a soul fighting to tear up over your kind words. I will rise :)

hugs! Yes, you will.

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