The Last Watcher :: 50 Word Short Story

in #fiftywords6 years ago

One more week closer to our deaths, we are given @jayna's lifeline of hope. Her Fifty Word Story Challenge is a beacon of light in the darkness.


The prompt this week: hatch


I went with something optimistic last week. This time around we go with something more at the other end.



The Last Watcher


Mara lifted the hatch on the trashcan, dropping in her rubber gloves, then leaned against the wall.

She had held the man’s hand until he died, but the car accident had destroyed his body. His wife had arrived too late.

Mara had been the only one to see her cry.







Title image by @negativer using Canva

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Human kindness. Good, good... ;)

😄😇😄

@creatr

Leave it to you to identify the human kindness in a story about death :) Thanks for reading!

My major surprise was that you didn't use the prompt to incorporate a "hatchet" into your story...

Well, shut my mouth! Now I've gone and given you an idea... :O

tune in next week...

A heart wrenching story! Dropping the gloves to me was the action that signifies defeat/dead end.

Indeed, it's one of the few things that most people can identify with and picture in a hospital scene that would signify 'it's over'. Thanks for reading!

Whoa. This is powerful, Neg. Agree with @mydivathings, the dropping of the gloves in the trash really paints the scene of the entire story. Eloquent display of the mechanics, showing the setting of the ER without mentioning it.

Thank you :) It's probably a common emotional scene; I kind of want to flesh it out in a short story more. Maybe for the next art prompt...

Oe, yes, do? I look forward to reading that.

Oh, this is moving, and tragic. Welcome back, #realnegativer!

After a one-week vacation...the darkness returns. :)

Thanks jayna :)

Great depth to that one, and little room for interpretation... Nice one..

A heart wrenching 50 words, Negativer. But also pointing to the power of caring and our human connection.

I'm glad you saw the optimistic side here. Thanks for reading!

The beauty in compassion and care endures:)

Succinct and poignant.

Thanks for reading!

powerful

well done.

Thanks much!

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