Mermaid disappeared in a ten-foot-deep pool. That's pretty imaginative! I also liked how slow and detailed the pace of the narrative was up to that point when the dog jumped in the pool and how quickly all the important transformations have taken place.
I can imagine how the operator goes over every little detail. Then suddenly the director tells him "Hey, Brian, we ain't got the whole life to shoot this flick. Finish it up quickly. The rest we will do in the editing room!"
Way to go!
Thank you so much for your encouraging comments! When I write a freewrite, I usually don't know how the story is going to end until I get there. I don't know how that mermaid got into my story, and I have no idea where she and Thomas went. Maybe a third dimension! Fortunately, my five minutes were up and I didn't have to worry about that part. Ha ha!
That's an interesting approach. In five minutes I cannot imagine anything at all -I am a blank slate. To think up a story I have to find some angle which will allow me to design the narrative. In this story, it was a realization that during a swim a person rarely has concentrated and direct thoughts, but rather distributed, vague and yet thoughts of large period of time (about entire life) but squashed in one slimy bundle. I guess you can open up your subconscious mind and just pour it out on electronic "paper". ))) A great ability!