[Assumptions] 2

in #funny6 years ago

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And here comes the part two about those great assumptions people make about me and my life! Yeye! So, do enjoy!

[Assumption 7 Satanist]

Absolutely. No doubt about it. There are only two kinds of philosophy of life. Either you believe in all and mighty go(o)dness or all and mighty badness. I’ve said that only thing I believe in, is me, and even that rarely. I have hard time to digest anything supernatural or have a faith in some higher power.
I love old pagan religions, but mostly because of their cultural history value and peculiarity. Okay, I do own some questionable literature like black bible, but out of curiosity, not because I believe in satan…

The reason why this person thought I’m satanist was my lack of faith and my harsh attitude towards people, but the killer strike was… Dunn DUNN DUNN TATTOOS. Yes, it is year 2018 and tattoos makes you satanist in the eye of society( read: stupid people). I kinda could understand if I had tattooed picture of pentagram (or something as much misunderstood ) on my forehead, it might rise a question to two, but my tattoos are all nature inspirited and somewhat subtle.

[Assumption 8 Pregnant]

Nope, no baby on board. At the time I was sick. And fat.

For some reason one of my aunts seems to think I’m with child. Though I’m not sure she knows how human reproduction works as she has thought I’ve been pregnant from year 2005…

And still nothing! Is this reverse from the miracle of Jesus' birth?!

[Assumption 9 Drug addict]

LIFE! I’m high on life! And caffeine. But mostly on life. I work in city center and unfortunately I see drug addicts and alcoholics in daily basis, I really don’t think I could be mixed to one of those… Okay, my hair might be messy and dirty occasionally, but I don’t stink like that. Or act that unpredictably, at least from my point of view.

Only drugs I have used are legal and prescribe for me, for a reason. And I don’t really think that a painkiller or two have any effect on my behavior. So still. Let’s go with ”the life is the best drug there is”- dictum.

And then I tried cocaine!

KIDDING!

Or am I ?

I am. Really.

[Assumption 10 Mental illness]

Yes. No. Maybe? I’m not sure, let me ask from the voices I hear in my head…

Hey guys! They want to know if we are psychos... Are we?

…Yeah, they can’t answer either…

I can be impulsive, and I have high temper, usually shit doesn’t effect on me too much, but when it does I will fire up like a wildfire and usually that is the time you shouldn’t be standing any near me.
I’m somewhat private person irl, I give and tell seemingly a lot about my life, but if you start to really think it, you realize you don’t know nothing. I do it on purpose. Often people are boring to me, and I have hard time faking it to be anything else. I admit that I like to play (with) people, but I get bored to that too. I control my self extremely well, unless I get frustrated. That is something I just don’t know how to hide. If you know me, you can read my frustration from everything I write, how I say things, how my body language works, simply everything I do. I never learned how to hide that one.

And my frustration is like a lightning, there might be already thunderstorm, but the frustration strikes like a lightning. So, from perspective, I might seem a little lot bipolar, but I’m not. At least there is no diagnosis about it! And I’m keeping it that way.

Ultimately

So this is the end of part two of the assumptions, I hope you liked them. I need to practice my resting bitch face and death stares in order to avoid these conversations in future. Or not. At least I can laugh at them, and me. And to those asking the weird stuff.

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You are so funny!

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you scared me ;)

With what? Being a satanist or being pregnant? :D I personally would be more scared of being pregnant, satanists i could handle, but giving birth to the devil it self....

if I would have to pick, my first pick from this list would be the satanist. But then... you can always go with a mental illness that's super subtle ;) Like a minor OCD, or something. Dunno! I'm not telling you what scared me... you might use that against me!

That is true. You are one of the smarts apparently :P If I can call you bitch (or cunt) and you won't get mad, we are gonna be friends.

Yes, my process of making friends is unique.

Haha, I have that with guys. Currently having the habit of calling them twats if I really like them :D

I see something in here ;) Sweetheart Cunt

Forever sealed in the blockchain :D

Your posts on this topic are too hilarious, my dear.

I love the way you attack the attackers.
Satanist! The way you start your post with that, you got me hooked for the whole read.
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Joe
@joe.nobel
science fiction, fantasy, erotica

PS What these clowns forget is to be a Satanist, you have to buy into the western religion god vs devil thing in the first place. For there to be a Satan, there has to be a God.

Being logical or smart had rarely anything to do with people’s nosiness.

I’m glad you find the topic entertaining:) i’ve heard that attacking is the best defence, so, why not ;)

Yes, if there were only a way of shoving your essays under their noses.

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