I wish I could give you a hug, Omra. You've my heart and my condolences for your grandmother's passing. May she rest peacefully now.

There's a universe of hurt in each breath when our feelings of guilt come in. Forgiving ourselves is the most difficult thing but I hope that you will. None of us know what each day will bring and in this life we can only do the best that we can. Knowing you, I've no doubt that your grandmother knows how much you love her. I've no doubt that you showed her through the years.

That you were shown the birds, so fitting for you, and the brick when you truly needed it was a blessed message. Let the burden fall away.

You've my support and I'm here for you, should you wish.